Too HOT for work! (must be for play instead) Punday Monday 87 Comedy Open Mic 46

in #contest6 years ago

Welcome to Punday Monday!

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New To Punday?

Pull up a stool, order a spiked PUNch, and get to know some of the regulars. I'm your PUNtender, @improv.

How To Make a Pun

This contest is open to everyone. Here's a handy dandy guide on how to make a pun: Learn to Pun

Rules for the PUN-test:

  • If you hope to win a prize, your pun must be your original work
  • Puns must be relevant to the topic of the week to win a prize, but they can be very loosely related.

Last Week's Punday Monday:

Here is last week's Punday Monday, and all the puns that were eligible to win this week are in the comments!

Hang on to your PUNderwear. The Winners of This Week's PUNday Monday Are...


(GIF by @littlescribe)

Rookie of the Week:

@payoutbot, who made a pun for EVERY president!

Pocket Choice Awards:

Every Friday, I put up a post to solicit audience favorites! They can vote on their favorites by sending POCKET to whomever they want to win. This week’s post is here: https://steemit.com/pocket/@improv/7lqhqr-pocket-friday

@payoutbot, @paul.atreides made you win this one, too!

  • POCKET Choice Winner's Circle Season One:

@aloha-creations, @professorbromide, @tcpolymath, @miniature-tiger, @lilygolightly, @chrisroberts, @stinawog, @f3nix, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @diebitch, @acolucky, @ablaze, and @paul.atreides.

  • POCKET Choice Winners' Circle Season Two:

@ablaze, @coinsandchains, @dollarsandsense, @doctorcrypto, @heroic15397, @littlescribe, @jk6276, @acolucky, @deceth

Grand Prize (which isn’t bigger than the other prizes, just grander):

  • Best Pun

  • Best Pun of the Entire Week

  • Best Overall Pun

DRUMROLL PLEASE.....

@payoutbot, gotta respect the hustle, especially when hustle = quantity!
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And What Prizes Do They Win, You Ask?

  • Full Strength, 100% Upvote!

Why, as usual, all the punsters got full strength upvotes on their submissions from @improv. This week they also got votes from @freewritehouse! They will next week, too! Together, these upvotes could total in excess of five whole cents!

  • SBI

Which are little bitty upvotes on all your content forever. See @steembasicincome for details. I’ll send one to all of our qualified entrants this week!
Our entrants were:
@richatvns, @pixiehunter, @doctorcrypto, @payoutbot, @acolucky, @paul.atreides

Our winners get bonus prize SBI for winning!
This week only, since our participants and our winners are the same, they each got ANOTHER bonus SBI!

Congrats, @payoutbot

  • @tipu Tip + @improv 100% upvote to the post of your choice

Our category winners will each get to choose a post (of their own or someone else's) and I will give that post a fully powered upvote and a @tipu tip!

This Week's Pun Topic Is:

Arizona (that’s where we are today)

As in, oh, no, This Arizona heat wave is so HOT. Someone turn off the sun!
OH. OK. WAIT, WHERE. IT LOOKS LIKE ONE IS ALREADY OFF. THE ONE IS OVER CHICAGO. WHERE DO YOU NEED IT?
Oh my, Ra, the sun god, is talking to me. If Chicago is number one, and it’s off, then I guess Two’s on!

I'm So Good at Puns

If you've never punned before, it might seem like magic! You can do it, too! Learn how in My Free How-To Guide on Punning!

@comedyopenmic nomination:

Who do I nominate for @comedyopenmic’s comedy challenge? I nominate the winners! This past week’s winners were:

@payoutbot (and @paul.atreides for the POCKET choosing!)




Sponsors, related content, prizes, and money

Sponsors!

@improv/ @freewritehouse

I mean, am I a sponsor of my own contest? Yes? I guess? Also, because I’m involved in @freewritehouse and they’ve/we’ve hosted Punday Monday events over on that page, I’d like to suggest that they (we) are also a sponsor! Regardless, check out the @freewritehouse community! Furthermore, they/we’re using their SP to upvote your puns!

@curie!

We are one of Curie’s chosen communities! Prizes have doubled in season 2, thanks to @curie’s sponsorship! Curie curators do tremendous work making sure unrecognized authors of quality content get recognized and rewarded! They do great work sifting through the heaps of posts to find the undiscovered gems.

Related Content:

  • Punday Monday Year One-Day contest results HERE
  • @freewritehouse offers writing and word-smithing contests every week
  • @steembasicincome has a contest round-up (that includes us) where you can find more opportunities to win SBI.
  • @contestkings features our contest and MORE!

Outside referrals that benefit me.

Coinbase:

Cryptocurrency investment wallet Join HERE and we’ll both get $10 of BTC

  • Hot tip, I buy BTC on pro.coinbase.com, then send it to bittrex to trade for Steem and send steem to my wallet here. It’s the most efficient way with the fewest fees I’ve found. If you’ve found better, let me know. - I learned from someone else that buying LTC and sending it to bittrex then trading it for BTC then trading that for STEEM is the least-fees way. Can someone confirm?

Robinhood:

Investment platform buying/selling stocks Join HERE and we’ll both get a share of a stock (probably worth ~$4)

Earn.com:

Small tasks for small rewards. Need a business or .edu email, Join HERE and we’ll both get $1 of BTC

Mannabase:

Sign up for universal basic income distribution funded by cryptocurrency Join HERE

Swift:

Yet another attempt at a UBI Join HERE

Swell:

If you’re interested in more traditional investing, Swell invests in stocks that have a positive social impact according to their standards, and has a referral program whereby they’ll match your first $50 investment. CLICK HERE for company website.

Sort:  

Wow this is a great one because it falls in with my passion for Music!
I know all types of deep details of the Rappers I follow, Everyone knows that Tracy Lauren Marrow was born and raised in Newark NJ. What they don't know is that during summers he would go to his grandmother's in Phoenix. Yea gulp down that info Fan's of Arizona's Ice-T!

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btw congrat's to Joe (@payoutbot) you need to send some pay this way with your abundance of riches!

We're thrilled you're punning! We love reading your puns every week. Want to come over and do some freewrites, too?

Hi improv,

Thank you for your entry in to #comedyopenmic comedy contest. We have asked the judges below to review your entry and give it a funny rating. (They generally have no sense of humor, as the saying goes, those that can't do, start contests and judge).
This will determine your ultimate position when the results are tallied. (That being said, you are free to adopt any position you wish - we can recommend pantsless with beer in hand.)

Judges:

If you have any questions or queries please feel free to contact one of the judges or come say hi in discord: Click Here

Click To Vote @ComedyOpenMic For Witness And Disrupt The Steem Blockchain With Laughter!
Support COM Banner

Thank you to @matytan for the great banner

Hey @improv,
In an effort to try to give people more transparency and feedback on what our judges think of their posts, we thought we'd run an experiment and give people their score from teh judges.

Your post achieved a score of 3/5.

Thanks for the lovely entry to our contest. Now some posts do really well, others not so well, and some could use some improvement. We hope the above feedback is helpful in making you a star.

  • Comedy Open Mic Team

Wow I'm honored...ty...
A little more info about my uncle

Here's a story father told me (Cecile) and my brother (Tyson) about my how aunt and uncle met.

My Aunt Zooey was working in a Pet Shop and uncle came in to buy a pet.. An exotic special animal.
But, because it was an exotic The taxes were high.
So my Aunt this for this special Bird had a Fire sale and rose up had the "Fees nixed", because she had one herself.

From that day forward, they were inseparable. Later they had your cousins, "Two sons".
So believe the story of Aron and Zoe, Naw? .You got me. I just wanted to state some stuff for C. T.'s amusement.

Sorry only 4.5 puns this week.
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@payoutbot is not a program I'm just a founding member of the Steeminati who pays out the worthy, by following the bretherns good deeds on the blockchain, by paying out like a robot!


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We're thrilled you're punning! We love reading your puns every week. Want to come over and do some freewrites, too?

I thought I had an exciting idea to drive my wife down to Mexico. But, no. I think it border.

We're thrilled you're punning! We love reading your puns every week. Want to come over and do some freewrites, too?

It is already Wednesday, where are all our regular punsters? It feels like in regards to this week's topic we have been DESERTED.

Tag them! Bug them! Comment on them!

Posted using Partiko Android

We're thrilled you're punning! We love reading your puns every week. Want to come over and do some freewrites, too?

Do you mind if I ASU if you expected the weather in Arizona would be cold and rainy or are U OF A predisposition to think optimistically?

The Navajo people tell a story about way back in the beginning of time when the young mountain laid down to sleep next to the Arizona desert. As soon as the desert fell asleep the mountain would poke the desert awake. After about the third time the desert became angry and thundered back at the mountain, "Why do you disturb me from my slumber?" The mountain echoed back, "I can't sleep because you're SONORAN."

I lived in Arizona for nine months back in '06 and '07. That is no joke. I had a place in Tucson between the University and downtown. Mostly, I enjoyed the many varieties of cactus that grow in the desert.

That's all really. I don't have a point to that. I just wanted to make conversation...

Saguaro you all doing?

Thank you so much for participating in the Partiko Delegation Plan Round 1! We really appreciate your support! As part of the delegation benefits, we just gave you a 3.00% upvote! Together, let’s change the world!

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