Feet: Comedy Open Mic #19 Entry 1

There are quite a few posts on the Comedy Open Mic that got a lot of attention. The themes of these posts revolve around the sexual body parts: penises, pussies, breasts, asses, and maybe a few others that slip my mind at the moment.

For one, I'm a bit jealous of the good size payouts. But, mostly, I want to highlight the other sexy part of the body that is either ignored or perhaps even shunned: the foot.

yogadigest.com

Look at that lovely bouquet of toes.

I grew up with old world middle European immigrants who settled in and carved farm fields out of the central swamplands of Minnesota. These folks taught me how to curse in angry German and treated me to a hard mix of ethnic foods. It may seem a bit eccentric but it shaped my taste for a good foot. Here are some examples of my favorite types:

The potato foot:

istockphoto.com

Simple but sturdy. This develops after years of good labor. Sleek curves and chock full of starch. Wash the dirt off, lather in horseradish, and go to town.

The wild green apple foot:

sutton elms

Pucker up. These sour babies are sure to wet the appetite. Be sure to check for worms.

The sauerkraut foot:

wikipedia

Nature is a bitch. Bad things happen to good people. Don't judge the lady by the lady's foot gravy. Toss in some sausage and save room for dessert.

The hoof:

core77.com

Not just a standard of the Southern United States and the Middle East. The cloven hoof is known for it's rough texture, its gripping ability, and its Old Testament prohibition...which is kinky as Hell.

Some of you might call this a fetish. I call it Saturday night. Don't judge the diet until you try it. Thanks for keeping an open mind.

I invite @idikuci and @dj123 to dinner. Thanks for 19 weeks.