Laid off for a little bit

I'm laid off but there will be some jobs coming up (hopefully). I went for a few days laying around as much as I could after getting the lay off slip. I wish I had more to contribute, but maybe I am contributing by giving some readers a frame of reference on some kind of modern cultural-psycho-emotional-stability spectrum. Anyway, I've been up and down like a roller coaster the past several days. Wish I didn't feel so "non-normal." Maybe I'd give myself the benefit of the doubt and feel like I partially fit in more places. I feel better when I just let go though. Probably why Zen (and the like) have had the appeal they've had over the past 13 or so years when I first started reading about all that Eastern philosophy stuff. I will never, as far as I can tell, be able to represent any form of thought other than my own.....so I will never be a "good" Zen Buddhist or any of that stuff. That doesn't mean I can't learn from those things, and use the tools handed down through the network of seekers over the ages. I've been listening to Alan W. Watts again the past couple days. He was a prodigy at having correlative vision....