In case you think I should see a doctor ...

This weekend I had a dear friend try to convince me to see a doctor.  While I love this lady to pieces, I found the request misguided and I feel moved to explain why that is so.  

In order to comprehend my position, it is very important to recognize and acknowledge that I AM the highest authority over my vessel.  I am a spiritual being in command of my vessel and as such, I refuse to give command of my vessel to anybody else, no matter how convincing their arguments should be.  Would a captain of a plane or boat turn over command to a passenger, stranger or even to their mother?  Of course not.  Only a higher authority could force them to surrender their vessel.  My higher authority is Creator and that would usually require separating my spirit from my vessel (death) to make that happen.  

A doctor is granted a license (feudal tenure) from his / her feudal master (the state) in order to practice medicine.  That same doctor is also given legislative instructions to report what he finds to his master.  He / she is given the power of being an investigator which is police powers and he / she must report what they find to the state.  

While I acknowledge that the doctors are very good at diagnostic and emergency medicine, they absolutely fail when it comes to health.  They focus on the physical vessel and ignore the emotional, mental and spiritual aspects of who we are.  It is no different than a mechanic constantly changing the tires and fixing the front wheel alignment without talking to the driver, examining how he / she treats the vehicle, exploring the roads that they travel on or whether they are spinning donuts in the parking lot each night.  It is also an observation that their skills at diagnostics are deteriorating as cracks within the system start to increase in size.

A doctor was granted authority over people.  That is why they can give 'orders' to people and use the courts or police to enforce those orders if necessary.  Violent and abusive!  Doctors order staff and patients all the time.  Has anybody else recognized this?  If I go see the doctor, then I must surrender my sovereignty.  I refuse to do that.  Yes, I still have the power of consent to accept or deny his / her orders, but I cannot escape their legislative duty to their master to report.  

I AM the highest authority

When it comes to the health and well being of my vessel, I AM the highest authority.  It is and always will be 100% my responsibility to ensure my vessel is healthy.  It is also completely within my jurisdiction to engage in risk or do as I please with my vessel.  Any interference with that is a violation of my sovereignty and violent!  My vessel is sacred as it is the seat for me, a spiritual being, while I'm experiencing life on this physical world.  I am a divine being and my vessel is sacred!  I refuse to surrender authority to anybody else.  If a doctor was willing to help me in the private, no attachments to the state of any kind, then I would entertain that level of assistance.  However, who's to say his knowledge or experience is any better than my own or those that are already helping me?

Just because I don't see a doctor does not mean I'm not receiving help!  I have an amazing team of people around me who are helping me heal physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.  This team of healers have skills and modalities that are not offered by the allopathic system.  If I die, I refuse to blame these individuals either as I AM 100% responsible for the health and well being of my vessel.  In some ways, trying to convince me to see a doctor is an insult to the professionalism, skill and experiences of my team AND me!  

What about my wife or my kids?

Yes, that question actually came up and I want to be perfectly clear in my response.  I love my wife and my two boys very much.  However, I will not sacrifice myself just to appease them or their fears or insecurities.  I find this question to be a covert violent attempt to induce guilt or shame in order to manipulate me to take actions that appease the one asking this question.  I love my friend dearly, but this question crossed the line.  This is about my own health and if that means that I will die as a result, then my family and friends will have to deal with their own feelings about that loss in their lives.  The choice is mine, not theirs.  To use the allopathic system to extend my life is not a good death and violates my spirit.  I find such a premise selfish and violent.  Why are we so afraid of death?  I wrote a blog post a few months back about death.  Perhaps it is time to revisit it.

https://steemit.com/ungrip/@wwf/a-good-death

I've done everything I can to provide for my family.  My death is a part of that process and I'm not afraid to experience it.  I'm not afraid of the idea of my wife or children dying either.  Yes it would be painful and I would miss them dearly.  But how selfish would it be for me to force the medical system onto them to extend their life artificially just so that I can get a few more days with them?  What if I'm preventing them from moving on so that they can get onto their next spiritual mission?  I will work very hard NOT to force my will upon others in that way and I ask that I be provided the same courtesy as well.  

I took this approach with my dad.  He went the doctor route and it ended up killing him.  I have no doubt that the chemo, radiation and all the other treatments killed my father.  But I hold no ill will against him, my mom or even the doctor & medical system.  It was his choice and I respect him for making that choice, even though I disagreed with it.  He needed to go through that experience as it was part of his life journey.  I shared my views and he rejected them.  That is the end of it and now I experience the process of mourning him as he passed away nearly 5 years ago.  

I know lots of people who do not think or believe the way I do.  They have no issues with using force or coercion to sick the medical system onto somebody because they are sick, ill or dying.  Are we so fragile and out of touch with our feelings that we want to avoid the pain of loss or death?  What could possibly justify using force or violence against others, especially when it comes to matters of health which are most likely manifested out of violence already?  How about we break the violence cycle and allow people to heal in peace without the coercive, violent nature of the state or it's medical system?

Are we so afraid of death that we work to avoid it at all costs?  People are willing to use all kinds of chemicals, poisons, vaccinations and a whole list of pharmaceutical drugs and crap to avoid death, despite all the side affects to life.  People are also so afraid of death that they don't live either!

I want to live and that requires having a slow dance with death!

For most of my life I was leading that dance.  There were moments when death took over and started to lead.  It is those moments that brought me back to the realization that I was having this dance with it.  Right now, death is leading and I am reminded once again that I need to take notice and make sure that I find the health I need in order to take over and start leading again.  We are all dancing with death.  How we dance will determine how long our life is but also how vibrant, alive and engaging that dance is.  Death is not a destination but a companion along this journey.  We cannot have life without death as they are in an integral partnership throughout the journey.  

Let me put this another way

When we breath in, why are we not afraid to breath out?  After all, we are expelling the very air in our lungs that keeps us alive?  Yet we have no anxiety about breathing out.  Why?  Because there is a very good change that we can breath back in for our next breath.  We have done it our entire lives but yet at any given moment, we could end up having our last breath.  It will happen at some point.  There is no avoiding it.  So why is it that we have no fear of breathing out?  

This life is but one breath in the whole scope of spirit.  Just as our bodies breath in and out hundreds of millions of times in a life time, our spirit could have hundreds of millions of life times.  Why are we so afraid to move from one life time to the next?  If we decide to make the best of each breath, our fear of death will diminish. When our fear of death diminishes, the control that the slave masters have over us goes away too.  Why?  Because they use our fear of death and pain against us.  When we shed our fear of pain and death, we end up freeing ourselves.  

In my view, the doctor question is rooted in fear of pain and death.  Why do I not see a doctor?  Because I don't want to live in fear or pain any longer.  I'm done with that shit and I thought I made that very clear in my blog, writings and the way I live my life.  Look past your own fear and pain.  Ask yourself why you would want me to see a doctor and question yourself if it is based on your own fear or out of genuine love as you feel I'm not being responsible or accountable for my life.  If it is the later, then you better make sure you know exactly what I'm doing before asking the question!  

I forgive my friend for asking the question.  I know what it is life to feel helpless around people that you love.  I see her fear and pain.  I really do.  I pray for her and those who feel that way.