I Need Help!

in #steemit7 years ago

steemit help.png

Would you help me build a great relationship with you because I am struggling and I need your help? Will you join me in walking through despair I am feeling after 2 months on Steemit and help me figure out how to do better going forward because I feel like I am not doing enough on Steemit despite spending about 6 hours every day 7 days a week here? I share this because I have learned it is important to walk through the pain in life and look at the lessons within the challenges in order to improve.

What might looks like success feels like a disaster.

With over 7800 followers in two months, thousands of dollars earned, and generous witness votes getting me 10 blocks a day within the first week, some might share this as a great Steemit success story. How do I actually feel about it? From my point of view I feel like a total fuck up. I feel the shame of not being good enough weighing down hard. I broke down and sobbed three times today because the pain was so great. What do I need to learn out of this?

Here is the list of things I feel am not not doing good enough on Steemit.

  1. Responding to comments.
  2. Writing thoughtful posts.
  3. Staying connected via steemit.chat.
  4. Upvoting great posts by followers.
  5. Respecting the service of those on Steemit longer than me.
  6. Balancing my use of Steemit with the rest of my business and life.
  7. Building real relationships with followers.

In summary, pretty much everything I am doing I feel like I am not doing it good enough. Even though I am doing my best to help out here and am getting rewarded very well for it, I still feel like I am not giving enough. As evidence ...

Projects launched within 2 months on Steemit.

  1. Crowdfunded Steemit ad campaigns.
  2. SteemJ freelancing platform.
  3. Steemit meetup.
  4. Becoming a witness.
  5. Upvotable curation project.
  6. Steemit video course.
  7. Authoring posts daily.

Any one of these would probably be enough but seven is way too many and evidence of someone who feels like they are not good enough desperately trying to seek approval by doing everything with most of it often ending up done half way if at all. I am grateful anyone is still following me after I have found ways to set up so many different expectations and then not meet them! I need help figuring out what is most important and focusing my time on what is most useful to you.

Would you help me understand what I do that is most valuable for our community because that is what I need to be focusing on? At the same time, would you help me see what I need to give up doing because this will make time for me to focus on the rest? For example, would you rather me make new posts or respond to comments? Do more ads or finish SteemJ? Help out more as a witness or do more meetups? Upvote your posts or respond to messages on steemit.chat?

Here are a few ideas that might be a good starting point.

Would you tell me which ones of these you like and/or share your own because that will help us all start using them?

  1. What if I focus on reading posts tagged with jerrybanfield or something else to help me find the posts you want me to read and upvote because this might be the easiest way for us to work together? Even with just following 300 people my feed is already more than I can handle while currently the https://steemit.com/trending/jerrybanfield category is pretty wide open.
  2. What if we make a certain tag up like #teamjerry that is code for me to read that comment because then I will be able to just search through posts and focus on those comments instead of currently I do not even see most comments while which ones I respond to are almost totally luck and most likely to be critical.
  3. Which projects should I drop and which to continue forward with? The one I can throw out is the upvotable one or maybe doing meetups because the others I have a lot of passion for. Which can wait and which needs to be done earlier? Maybe the crowdfunded ad campaigns could wait? Maybe Steemit is not ready for SteemJ yet and I should just pay the developers out the reward that have been working on it?
  4. Should I just give up using steemit.chat unless I need help with something because using it just seems crazy to be typing responses there when I am not even responding to most comments here?
  5. Drop down to just one post a day because testing 3 posts a day has been absolute hell? What do I write about that you care about the most? So far it seems like tutorials and cryptocurrency updates.
  6. How much to upvote comments? 1% to 3% to let the author know I read it? 10% to 100% for a really good comment? Just ignore comments without the #teamjerry tag?
  7. How do I respect the service of those that have been here since the beginning? Clearly this is something that is difficult for me in every area of life as I walk into any room and think I know better than everyone else. After going a few years, I am certain of it.
  8. What to do about being a Steem witness? Is this a worthwhile use of my time? Should I invest the time to get better at managing my server or just disable my witness and let others do it to free my time up? How often to help out others in the steemit.chat witness channel if I am going to do it? Would it be better if I drop asking for votes or ask at the end of every post or ask in comments or ask in private messages?

Thank you for walking through what feels like the bottom of the ocean with me! I jumped into Steemit with so much excitement that I fell like an anchor to the bottom. Now I am lost in the dark and reaching out for help.

Would you help me build a deeper relationship with you and understand my place in our community because I am having a hard time seeing it myself?

Love,
Jerry Banfield

Sort:  

oh Jerry! Brother. Let me give you a hug.. Im really feeling you.
Will you let me tell you what to do?
Please start by taking the next two days off.. Spend it with your family.
You've been burning the candle at both ends.. and sometimes it makes everything seem much worse than it really is.

What you do for the community is more than most. Please let that in.
Your desire to help is from a great heart.. and sometimes we want to fix everything ourselves.. but we cannot. You can't single handedly make everything ok.. Its not really possible.. We have to honor ourselves and know in our hearts that what we do is the best we can do, and no one can ask more from us.. Im sure that you are doing the best you can do.. it seems very obvious. SO please take a step back and appreciate yourself.

Now, if you ask me the most important things you do on Steemit i believe it is your desire to help find good content from other people. You are doing this already and it is probably the single most important thing i can see that is needed here. Why? Because SO many people like myself pour out hearts and souls into posts, some of us spend hours on a single post.. There are so many people who are writing amazing content, like on my ecoTrain, and they will not last long. I mean how many posts can you write that gets just 5 or 10 views before you want to give it up.. With the ever increasing user base, this will only become more the case.

Therefore, I would say you should use your amazing mind to keep figuring out ways to help good posts get discovered. I have done what I can to do this by creating the ecoTrain, but im sure you can come up with even better ideas..

By doing this you will continue to bring such joy to authors, and also the people who end up reading and benefiting from these posts.. Promote those topics that are close to your heart like veganism, love, etc and see how nice it will feel.. We must do what makes us feel good..

I hope this helps! I feel a good connection with you since some time and would be very happy to chat further to see if i can help you come up with any new ways to achieve this.. Im sure there are some!

See you Wednesday Jerry! ;-)
<3

@eco-alex thank you very much because you shared exactly what I needed to hear! I am hear to stay and need to step back a bit to get perspective. Take some time off and return refreshed. I will take Tuesday and Wednesday off to just let my scheduled posts come out!

That's wonderful news, im sure you will feel a lot happier, clearer and more focused after your short break. Just like steem power, we need time to recharge ;)

Awww I can feel the love you guys ❤❤❤ @eco-alex said everything I wanted to say and then some. I hope you have a great time off Jerry. Dont worry about Steemit world - we'll all still be here when you get back :)

Hey Jerry, I don´t feel experienced enough to give you advice... but, I´m not sure what all your currently running projects are, I know about your effort to make this whole crypto-coin-stuff kind of understandable for newbies like me. So what you did with your videos to me personally was 1) make understand better the tools and sources for crypto, which 2) got me into the mining and trading, followed up by 3) getting me to know and to sign up on steemit.com (yes this one our video was really hipnotyzing...).
I don´t own much yet, and I already thank you a lot.. but I´m sure in a year from now, I will want to paint your profile picture on my new Lamborghini :o)
You´ve done too good till now, relax.
Thanks!

you are oxygen of steem it

When you return id love to see if you would like to follow the ecoTrain feed as a VIP. We,ve done a lot to bring wonderful authors here and the final piece of the puzzle to make it all come together would be having you on board. It feels like a perfect fit.

https://steemit.com/created/ecotrain

Hi @jerrybanfield, you are the one who referred me to Steemit, thank you.

Try not to worry too much and just be yourself.

Have a nice day!

My attention seeking gif.

Hello @jerrybanfield #teamjerry
This is my attempt at an honest and straight forward reply, and I am including it as a reply because @eco-alex 's post was very good.
Everything here on out is my humble opinion.

  1. Write less posts. Give it your all to make high quality content. 3-6 posts a week is ambitious. Talk to me (us) about your projects, workflow, cryptocurrencies and flights of fancy.

  2. Read more comments on the steem platform. Make friends. Minimize chatting off or outside of the steem platform.

  3. Upvote! And use that slider wisely, its a powerful tool. Tell your followers that your upvotes roughly represent a 0-5 scale, 5 percent upvote being an enormously helpful or appreciated comment, and less percentage being less valuable but still creating an interaction. A very small upvote could indicate a certain message.

  4. Make a scale with your followers! Keep the voting percentage low so that you can interact more. Perhaps a high quality article could be voted with more power, but 0-5 percent seems just right for comments.

  5. Stop doing what doesnt bring you immediate joy and passion. Drop the witnessing and the steem.chat and whatever else your not digging and do less stuff better.

  6. I love the dream behind steemJ!

Thanks Jerry for opening a dialogue.

Jerry for president!

I like #teamjerry. If you want to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel better you can help me with my steam because I have the same feeling of going 3 hours a night but look i only got 4 bucks!? hehe.

Also i @'d you last night as one of my inspirations and mentors and checked today if you'd reply but wimp womp, i cry too seeing no up votes or attention from any of my fav bloggers lol .... ^_^

Cheer up dude. You're bout be rich off the recession remember!?
Start a coin or something that can help us little crypto babies ?!!
live forever as a Leader face on a coin that didn't destroy a country through political arbitrage or currency debasement... Maybe one that made people richer than you already have helped folks too.

You help us every day man, remember that, feel good about your self as a beacon of light giving us broke nerds hope..

i mean my moms 60, black, single, having cervical surgery, just lost her job as an art teacher for sending the wrong brat with the wrong uber, hesitant to try uber or anything else as a new revenue source, and crying in the other room ass we speak.

Thats why I'm studying crypto 5 hours a night the last 5 weeks... you were maybe the 4th youtube i watched, and 5 weeks later i still come back to you.

Sound advice eco alex. Just looking at the sheer amount of comments on this single post, gives me some idea of what jerry has to deal with on a daily basis. But like you say, great minds and all... sometimes cooperation , coordination, delegation and teamwork are the best way forward ... but first, jerry, take a break. you deserve it.

Great advice. Read this one Jerry!

Loading...

Blah blah blah...suck it up man!
you're a great success and lots of people are happy to be part of it.

Of course you can't respond to everybody...
Of course all your posts won't be great...
Of course some people are A-holes...

The very BEST thing you can do is to send out positive energy, by being positive yourself... quit fucking whining and get on with it...or don't
But look at the good first, second and third, and forget about the shit that's bugging you.
Christ! You're like a 0.1 percenter complaining about the cost of your pet's thereapy sessions lol

Be happy mofo! Shut off the computer and go smile at someone on the street -- you'll be glad you did.

Cheers! from @thedamus

Jerry, I'm going to have to agree with @thedamus here. More people should be like you on this platform. I say just pick out the tasks that you enjoy the most and eliminate the others. And by doing that, you will not in any way diminish the site or the community because your output, no matter what tasks, is always above and beyond. You do not have to go overboard though. That is not healthy for you, especially if you are really serious about actually crying over it. You're a kind man, but remember there are so many more things that we will need to cry over in life, please don't let this be one of them. You are a shining light here. Know that.

@thedamus haha your comment has earned you a follow from me..I like your honest approach without apologies!!! lets stay in touch buddy.

For sure! I do appreciate the positivity of steemit in general, but sometimes ya just gotta say what's the what. There's a difference between being supportive and being a slimy sychophant in the hopes of getting a whale's kiss...

Have a minnow smooch from me ;)

You are correct buddy. I notice that when ever a whale or super fat dolphin post something a lot of minnows bounce on it licking .....haha with funny comments for some whale or fat dolphin kiss and it works sometimes for them. bein real is sometimes not popular but the smart ones appreciates it even more. Lets stay in touch

He might not reply to this also. ;)
But ya, True that!

But you did ;)

Cheers!

I like your no nonsense approach. I need that from time to time as well. Pity parties suck the life out of us.

Cheers!
One for all and all for one!

"You're like a 0.1 percenter complaining about the cost of your pet's therapy sessions"

Bah ha ha -- the mocking of N. Cage is always welcome ;)

Kudos for being a great example to show others it's ok to express how you feel...even when it's not a happy time! And vote up 100%! Think of it as your way to affirm to yourself (and those connected with you) that there is plenty to go around!

And if you're on Steem all day... maybe vote 50% when your voting power hits 50%? https://steemdb.com/@jerrybanfield

@robertgenito thank you for the words of encouragement and again for being the one that referred me here!

Jerry, Honestly it's sad reading this and I feel for you. I have followed your life stories on Steemit and Youtube and even on your University website. You are a mentor of mine and you are the reason I got into this cryptocurrency space. You have made me loads of money as I've followed your advice (don't take this hard on yourself if you gave wrong advice, because it's up to us to make the final decisions) Just keep doing what you do, because there are loads of people who respect you for all the work you put in! We appreciate your contribution to this platform and when the markets turn around, Steemit is going to be huge!

THANK YOU JERRY FOR ALL YOUR HELP, YOU HAVE HONESTLY HELPED IMPROVE MY LIFE.

Same goes for me. And Jerry, don't beat yourself up. You're doing great.
We all love you!

I see the quality versus quantity of posts as a fair consideration. I see it all too often that people write just for the sake of writing, which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but one must ask if it is contributing substantive thought that may have had a chance to further develop with more time. I wouldn't limit yourself to a certain number of posts a day - simply write as you see fit, and if there are days where you feel you don't have much to contribute, find solace in knowing that there is no pressure to constantly deliver.

do you know think that the problem is deeper jerry? i've watched you over the years try this and that, put money here, try and recreate the buzz of certain ways of the past in the ways of the future, what you looking for, what do you DEEP DOWN need, validation? acceptance? you have to set the terms of the deeper relationship, what do you want from me before i can give that to you? - it seems to me like your trying to be everything for everyone yet you can't seem to be that for yourself. this is not a diss it's more about a course correction and a real self deep dive.

if you ask me it's a similar cycle to your addiction/addivtive personality, you get bored because you don't feel what success/reflection really is. your always in the moment yet you have an idea of what a deeper connection is, what is it, what do you want people to do for you? what are you looking for, because i feel this post is just a precursor for you to jump onto the next big thing, and the next big thing and the next. .. don't you see that?

hope you do, love to have a chat with you over video chat if you feel up to it. cheers, phil! :) all the best!

update - also, if you want help you did'nt need to accept money for this post.. .. right?

In order to improve yourself, you have to keep looking out for new things, stay active, stay hungry, listen to people around you...
Then when you see the right catch, go for it!

wise humble team man! great comment wow!

it's teamhumble, but thanks! just being real.

just being humble -0 lol

absolutely. i can be a contradiction if i want ;)

zing, drop some acid jerry we all love you

@teamhumble ... i think you stressed out major points here.

what do you want from me before i can give that to you?
Yes bcuz you have got from us views votes & comments = relationship on social media.
If you are asking something else then tell us like you should mix your posts a little bit ....... make them personal your habits hobby life style or make another channel ...don't mix work with your personal life ....... It's different getting comments from people sharing your ideas.

you get bored .....

Keep it up with only one post a day or five per weak .... that way you feel exited about the next day you have a moment to catch up with people and your self.
a lot of touching kills fealing
It's more meaningful in Arabic so.

Don't tell people what your going to do ...I'll be voting 1% 10% it's like you have judged people already , don't give it a scale keep it like a game some days you vote some days you don't feel like it ,i like this i like that don't make it an obligation or a task .
And remember there is a problem bcuz you make it to be a problem , no one came to you saying hay @jerrybanfield we have a problem.

Following people is always a good step and I know you know this as a social media pro. Using a tag with your name in it is asking a little much. I could see Kim Kardashian doing something like #KimsButtImplants. Now I need to get in on the votes Kim could make with my idea.

Thanks for the video you made about Steemit. I shared it all over.

All my posts are tagged in the 5th position with fitinfun because I have learned to do that on other platforms such as you tube. Not that I have a clue what I'm doing right or wrong here - just a minnow still swimming.

Hey now @hilarski ... I made my own hashtag and now its on steemit's Topics page haha

If you go to any of my posts and click on the fitinfun tag - guess what you see! It's a beautiful thing.

You know how it's hard to find your posts on steemit if you resteem a lot like me? A proprietary tag fixes that and I will soon have a nice invite in my post footer, so people can go see me in all my glory.

Click new, trending, or hot for the fitinfun tag, and you see me, me, me! So yes, @jerrybanfield - you should make a tag and use it in your 5th position. In your case your two names work just fine.

Additionally, if you use steemit search for fitinfun - my posts all come up! Most people only have their profile and not the individual posts since they are not tagging with their user name.

I'm doing the happy dance over here. And I'm not talking about a gif. Me and kimk have got it going on and anyone with a brand should be using a proprietary tag too.

WooHoo! Thanks for making me look!

Greaat replay mate

@JerryBanfield I believe in our dynamic we have seen eachother at great highs and impossibly dank lows. And I would be willing to bet that no matter what you put your mind to, your endeavors will be more than successful just as mine would be. If someone told you 8 or so years ago before you realized that your life needed change, that you would be where you are today, do you think you would have believed that? Change is healthy and scary at the same time. I was recently told by an employer that I was afraid that I would only ever amount to being a cashier at minimum wage jobs. He told me some very sage advice. His words resonated with my being. "Tyler, you will only ever be a cashier making minimum wage in the world until you truly believe that you should be doing more. Until you truly believe that your own personal insecurity and fear will keep holding you back. " Since I was given that advice I believe my life has been far better and more richer than ever before. As long as you believe in yourself , and you keep trying, you can accomplish anything. I speak that as someone who has known you for nearly a decade. Someone who has laughed with you. Someone who has at times been upset with you. Someone who has often asked you for advice. And someone who has cared about you.

Jerry if were going to look to you for guidance on Steem the whole community is going to need two things. First, wear a shirt. We're a professional operation. Secondly, go back to making smiling videos like the jare bare we like. You do a great job. Don't stop being you. You let people stick a finger in your face and tell you you're no good. The cryptos sunk last weekend a lot too. Nothing, even the crypto fall, is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard your hit...it's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward...how much you can take and keep moving forward...that's how Steem it's done. Now if you know you can make good videos go and upvote what your worth. But don't worry about this or that, or you not where you want to be...people that aren't good at Steem it do that and that ain't you. YOU"RE BETTER THAN THAT! I'm always going to like your videos. Don't forget to say hi to your followers.

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