Where I disappeared To
"Being helped is not being given a pill a day-hell, four pills a day. Being helped is finding deep-rooted issues and learning how to cope with them. If pills were the answer, I would still have a stash of xanax bars in my side-table drawer. Do not send me away by making my brain foggy. I am here, and would like to be in the first time in a long time. Show me care by talking to me, or you will never know how to help. Without that, how am I supposed that anyone will help me at all? Fuck, dude, the crazy people around me help me more than the people with a college degree who claim to know best. It is hard to believe that it is day two, and it is even harder to believe that it is only temporary.
I keep looking out of the window to view the courtyard. I have never had a stronger urge to smell the flowers.
Stop asking me how I feel. I want to be in this life, but this is not how I want this life to be.
It is funny, being in a place of care that makes you realize that not everyone who says that they care, care. The fucking irony. The person who played a major role in causing this probably gave more of a shit about me."
I love that picture :)
I think a lot of these mental health professionals lack the self awareness to help themselves, much less anyone else. Hopefully you know I care. Feeding people pills to keep them repressed and not facing themselves is probably the most harmful and insidious thing the pharmaceutical industry does in this country and I'm glad every fucking day that I stopped filling my prescriptions and listening to those people. I wish you the best on your journey and if you need to talk, you already know how to get in touch with me. :)
Going to the hospital was one of the first big things that I did for myself, but I really did learn those things when I was there, I realized that I am more than what I thought. I met a lady there that was what I could have been, and she told me she thinks I was having a spiritual awakening. She was destined to be my roomate..thank you, you know that it goes for you too :)
We were all meant to live for more than what we thought we were. I'm glad you got over the biggest hurdle. <3
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Hello @kaysiewashere and welcome back to Steemit. We've missed you :-) If I have read your post correctly I know what you mean. It is so easy for so called 'professionals' to throw you a pill and then leave you to get on with it. For many you're just a case note to write up and then forget. I'm lucky in that I have a family doctor who we have known for years and is willing to take the time and effort with you and direct you to the best possible care. He prescribed me my anti depression medication and it is what I need right now. It enables me to function well but it is something I would rather not be on as I feel my emotions have dulled and I'm not experiencing life as I should. I feel for you and hope you battle through things (I'm sure you will - you seem like a fighter). Keep posting and let us know how things go for you. Take care of yourself.
I teared up a little. You're very kind, much love.
Hang in there. Much love back.