Lesson of the Day Vol. 5

Lesson: Our perception of the world is a mirror for how we're dealing with our own personal demons.

Thoughts: This has been said before in many different ways, but I wholly believe it to be true. If we are negatively judging ourselves, our thoughts, and our emotions - we will find ourselves negatively judging people we interact with, current events and novel ideas. While I have never really liked the concept of a person being a "hater," it is relevant here. A hater is someone who reacts negatively to the accomplishments of others. To be full of hate is also to be full of fear, and to be entirely full of fear is to be devoid of love and positivity. One cannot support another's accomplishments without their own personal sense of hope. To help some that we have no hope for would be an exercise in futility.

I have a belief that in counseling, we should be looking at every aspect of an individual's thought process. This often involved really digging in to some of the deepest, darkest and most closely held secrets an individual has. An individual's defenses often make it difficult to get to the dark parts. In my experience, once we can dig into those thoughts, and expose them to the air and the light in the room, they lose power over the individual's psyche. A trained professional meets those thoughts without judgment, and the individual is given permission to feel his feelings and accept his thoughts without shame or judgment - recognizing that they are just thoughts and not their individual identity. Once this happens, it is easier to look outwards and see the actions of others as positive. The more we reject in ourselves, the more we will reject in others. This can lead to depression, negativity and isolation. Accepting our darkest parts allows us to be illuminated by others.