The problem here is that love is blind.
It is really hard to see the flaws or even the red flags when what your programming in your mind is a perfect paradise.

You want the love so much, you delude yourself.
Further, our schools and churches do not teach anything about love.
They do not teach that men and women love, and see love differently.
In fact, they try to delude everyone into thinking egalitarian equality is real.

And something that women really need to be knowledgeable of: When you marry someone, your desire for that person drops. There is no longer the fight, the struggle to win the person, and so, your hind brain turns off some of the attraction chemicals.

Further, there is so many movies about, if you aren't happy, you should leave him. And almost no movies about actually finding your happiness. So, we are unprepared for actually making a relationship last.