GOING DOWN THE BLACK HOLE

People going under anesthetic can often lead to interesting and funny conversations.

Some of my earliest memories as a child, are going to the dentist. I remember the laughing gas, I was asked to count to 10 as the mask was put over my face but I never remember getting to ten. I just remember my awareness turning “black”, and I don’t remember regaining consciousness.

As you can imagine with my family of four girls and my unconventional wife, they too have their own experiences to add.

The first experience would involve my eldest daughter, Tanith.
We were living in Stutterheim and there was no dentist in the little town, so we would drive the 70 km to East London. Well the time came for Tanith to have some dental work done, this was when she was about 6/7 years old. The dentist decided that it would be best for Tanith to be under “Conscious Sedation”. He prescribed a patch that my wife had to put on Tanith’s arm as we left Stutterheim and the child also had to take little tablet. All was going great and according to plan. We arrived at the hospital in East London and Tanith was still able to walk unaided. Michele asked her to sit in the waiting room while she reported the arrival to reception. When Michele came back to us, Tanith (usually a very responsible and seriously minded child) was sitting on the chair (which was covered with a durable and smooth plastic) and then slid off. She kept landing in a little bundle on the floor and continued doing it amidst her own loud laughter. The medical staff eventually took Mom and Tanith through for Tanith to be“prepped” for the operation. Once completed Tanith was then taken to the Doctor. We had to wait in a little room for Tanith to come out after the operation. They wheeled her in saying that all went well and it was just the butterfly clips in her hair that wiggled. Tanith was sleeping at first but then she started to come around and started to cry. Michele rushed to Tanith, only to receive a fist to the face! Michele recoiled with tears streaming down her face, how could her child could do such a thing? Tanith saw Michele retreat and started crying for her mommy again. Again Michele went to her and again the little fist shot out! This time Michele was ready for it and ducked. She eventually fell asleep and woke up totally oblivious to what had happened.

We had moved to Krugersdorp in 2002 and Tanith had to have her tonsils removed. However, when she woke up,she was not so aggressive; it was just a smile. She was older, perhaps that helped. This on this occasion, every time when she got up to leave, she would turn green and have to lie down again. Green in humans is an actual colour!!!

Shae needed to have her tonsils out when she was 7 years old. Always my little bundle of energy and a very happy child. All went well and they wheeled her back out to Michele with a drip and the sides of the bed up. Shae woke up and with large eyes she looked around and proclaimed, Who am I ???? Where am I ??? This went on for a good hour with Shae climbing over the railings, hiding under the bed, peeping from under the bed and continually calling out ….. Who am I ???….. Where am I ??? Michele could not help but laugh, but the more Michele laughed the more insistent she became in her questions. She too eventually fell asleep and awoke a different child.

When Shae was 17 though, she went in for a minor procedure. When she was wheeled out, her eyes still glazed over, she asked for her phone. She proceeded to message everybody on the phone. Michele was still so impressed as Shae was typing and sending her messages with such speed and confidence, and Shae really seemed to know what she was doing. She handed the phone to Michele and lay down and went to sleep. Only once replies to all the messages started coming back did Michele realise that Shae had typed total gibberish to every single one of her contacts. Needless to say, all her contacts had utterly no idea what was going on; they were all very confused.

[nervously waiting for the op]

Kiera had her tonsils out when she was 5 years old. Michele prepared her snacks and a book for a day long wait, while the child recuperated. They took Kiera in and did the operation. She was wheeled out before 7 in the morning! She was fast asleep. When she woke up, still with the glazed eyes she proclaimed that she wanted her crisps and her coke, immediately. The reason being that her older sisters had told her that you get coke and chips after an operation. Michele asked the nurse for some water, to which Kiera very indignantly stated that she did not want water, she wanted coke and crisps. They brought it and Kiera consumed it all without flinching, then told her mother that she wanted to go home. Michele was home with her before 8 in the morning.
Kiera later had her wisdom teeth removed when she was eighteen. It was a very different story this time round. While Michele was waiting for Kiera, other children who had the same procedure, were wheeled back into the ward sleeping peacefully while lying calmly on their backs. But when Kiera was brought back, she was on her face with blood all over; her drip tangled and her hair all over the place! The nurses said that as they put her on the bed she started spinning and they could not restrain her. She lifted her head with wild looking eyes and glared at Michele. Poor Michele was trying to de-tangle the drip and wipe some of the blood off of Kiera’s face who looked like a vampire after a feast. Kiera mumbled something and collapsed back down to carry on sleeping. With Kiera's paranoia about tablets, thanks to Michele (another entire article, Kiera spent the rest of the healing time apparently pain free and only used ice packs for swelling.

[ouch]

[time to go home]

these stories of my family can be mild in comparison to others I am sure and their reaction to anaesthetic, ask your friends, you will probably be highly entertained by their experiences.