Curation, is what I stared with it helps but sometimes even that is overwhelming.

Today I am completely discouraged!

I realize i don’t want the attention but I want to participate. I want to create and to be reviewed but being a perfectionist I will never be happy with what I have created no matter what I am told.

Does that mean I am giving up? NO, my negativity is my drive in a way but it can be a challenge not being overcome by it. If anyone watches my content I want them to get a “real” sense from what I produce and well positivity isn’t my best quality.

How do I support others with negativity? Criticism, I see flaws, I see areas of improvement, I can often add a dark light to any situation. Trick is wording things in a constructive manner.

So today I am down on myself, even though I spent yesterday meeting a few new people, gained a follower who produces great content herself, even encouraged her to start daily posting on dtube, set up a discord server, transferred my mining rewards into Steem, finished my first week on dtube daily posting, created my first montage, purchased the software to make everything streamlined, I am still frustrated with myself!

Is it the lack of attention? Yes and no, sometimes we need to take a step back and realize that the emotions arn’t particularily relavant to the intrinsic investment, yes I would like to have a video in the hot or trending list it would be cool just to say that I did it yet I struggle with being in the spotlight. I put myself here maybe because I wanted to step outside my comfort zone, man am I uncomfortable!

Energy is energy no matter the form use it constructively, take a step back, don’t make emotional decisions!

I started here as a curator, no intention of trying to contribute, but then I did it, now the ball is rolling I have only the choice to jump off or keep running and stay on top, today I stumble but have not fallen!

@dlife you encouraged me to try, supported my efforts, and in return you have gained my full support! It all started with answering my comment, that was it, you answered me, look at the direction you have encouraged me to take!? You are boss at this encouraging thing and I try follow your example. I know you’ll say I have good things to say but you may not know that’s only after careful deliberation of what not to say.

Taking your lumps and #steemon, nothing in life that’s worth fighting for comes without the fight! Today I fight my inner demon, negativity!

Perfect timing for this, perfect opportunity for me to collect my thoughts on the subject as I write about them, thank you.