Mizu No Oto - Every Image Has Its Haiku - Edition # 39 (English)
[photo by @marcoriccardi]
at the cusp
of the turning tides
harmony
This is my entry to https://steempeak.com/haikucontest/@bananafish/mizu-no-oto-every-image-has-its-haiku-edition-39-english The photograph is the prompt. Please try your hand at this!
The path this haiku took:
teal, steel, calm, sand, boulders, blue, early morning,
rise and shine
tide, tidal,
rise and fall
essence, cusp (zodiak), tip
at the cusp
of the turning tide
at the cusp
of the rise and fall
expectant, await, wait,
balance, harmony
at the cusp
of the rise and fall
harmony
at the cusp
of the turning tide
harmony
at the cusp
of dawn's turning tide
harmony
at the cusp
of the turning tides
harmony
This one came out more easily than most of my haiku do. I'm not sure how I feel about that; I would have liked to spend more time with it. I am happy with the result though.
All images are my own unless otherwise stated.
If another line could be added, I would write: Peace and Love.
aw. thanks for reading and for your sweet sweet comment. I could have just used those three words instead of harmony.
I certainly had not thought that this could form part of your Haiku itself, besides Harmony encompasses many ideas, LOL
Now I wish I had given "harmony" three syllables that mean the same but are not so obvious. If a feeling of harmony is the object, it would be better not to use the actual word.
So perhaps one should think more about what is not palpable at the first impression and as you say the person who reads poetry stops and reads it two or three more times, then finding the deep meaning it has.
yes! One has to find ones way through a haiku, slowly, let it sink in. the word harmony is too obvious. However, I can't think of a thing! here are some words I like: mutual, tranquil, absolute, unbounded, open pure, full, free spirit, untethered, innocent
at the cusp
of the turning tides
innocence
That's better, less obvious. I'll keep trying. Thanks for your input! I love working on stuff together. Wewrite haiku!
It's not easy to find a way to express harmony without name it, in three syllables.
Generally, I tend to avoid to name abstract concepts, but there is a drawback: the feeling evoked in the reader is almost certainly different from mine.
This is fine for me, but maybe another haiku author wants more precision.
My take on this one could have been something like that:
at the cusp
of the turning tides -
tranquil breath
oh yes! That is lovely! thank you!
What is the rules of a haiku? I have read about it in the past but don’t remember now.
Oh it's easy.
Three lines: 1 - maximum 5 syllables, 2- max 7, 3 - max 5
If you can, get some sort of break in between two of the lines, so that the poem is not one 17 syllable sentence.
Say something about the provided photo.
That's it!
More explanation of the qualities of a master haiku are in the contest post, and it's helpful to have read it, but none of the characteristics are required as I understand it.
The bold 3/5/3 poem is my entry. All that stuff underneath is just what I did to get there. You don't have to post that, just the haiku is what most people do. Some folks tell a story about how they wrote it, or what it means or what they tried to do, but usually not. Read the other entries. It's a broad bunch.
Thanks. I can’t seem to remember where to find my key to login at the haiku place but I was kinda inspired by the photo.
How’s this?
the sea calls
a beached sailor pines
for freedom
Excellent! This is the scene the sailor sees, and it's calling him. I love it!
You should be able to click on the link in my post to get to the contest. Here it is again. https://steempeak.com/haikucontest/@bananafish/mizu-no-oto-every-image-has-its-haiku-edition-39-english
You don't need to make it into a whole post if you don't want to, you can just put the haiku in the comments, but you'd get some upvotes on a post if you posted it too. I do both.
Thanks again. You got just what I was thinking when viewing the image.
Unfortunately when I click on that link, I find that I am not logged in when I get there so I cannot leave a comment.
I have to try to remember how to find my login key. Haven’t had to do that in awhile.
I have all my keys saved in word so I can copy and paste them as needed, also on a travel drive, just incase.
If you make a post, I can put the link in the contest for you. I could even just submit that haiku for you as a comment on the contest post if you like, and get you going now while you figure the rest out.
Please do submit it for me if you have time. Thanks.
No you can just put @bananafish into the search bar and go directly to the post from there. What are you using? Steemit? Esteem? partiko?
Hey, that worked. I am able to go there and stay logged in. Thanks.
I will post it in the comments if you haven’t yet.
Steemit.
I have the keys somewhere on my computer but I have just been using a iPad and don’t even use the desktop much at all lately.
I forgot - no title, no capitals - I try to do both of these, but once I used capital letters and thought it worked.
Hey @owasco
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thank you - I will stop by later to see what y'all are about. I appreciate the support!
My last read of the day. I will take this to my dreams with me and awake with it in the morning tomorrow:
expectant, await, wait,
balance, harmony.
Isn't that all we need to reach peace sometimes? Stay still ... wait.
Thank you for this beautiful piece @owasco.
What a most wonderful read to finish my day :)
✨🌊💗🌞🙏🌞💗🌊✨
Posted using Partiko Android
A wonderful resulting haiku, and it was fun to read the trail of how you got there. That's not something a lot of writers would share.
I get a kick out of rereading it! lol
Now I wish I had held onto it a bit longer and come up with a less obvious way to show harmony than saying "harmony". am having a bit of trouble thinking of something. I love doing this. I could do it for days on end, and have.
I wish I could magically come up with something, but I'm empty too!
I feel that we shake the same impressions with the observation of the photo of this edition. I perceived many things, but I liked more, like you, the ups and downs of the sea in relation to the moods that, in this case, tend towards peace, serenity. I really liked your proposal, @owasco.
A cordial greeting.
in my opinion, the fact that this time it took less steps to get to the final shape is a good sign. The haiku should aim for immediacy. The mental and spiritual preparation can be very long, to reach the emptying of the mind and the sharpening of the perception, but once this state of preparation is reached the single haiku should arise almost spontaneously.
The result, however, is excellent!
oh thank you for that explanation! I'll try it next time. It feels a bit scary already - what if nothing comes out after all that "work"? That is how a writer friend of mine works - she immerses herself in the topic for weeks, but when she finally begins writing, she freewrites. She does not revise afterwards, other than to proofread. Her stories are brilliant: concise, deep, intricate and well-structured.
Thank you for thinking it excellent. I became unhappy with the word "harmony" after I posted. @felixgarciap and I had a conversation about it in the comments here if you'd like to see what we did with it.
You have a great contest here. I know it has to be a lot of work, so please accept my thanks for running it. I'm learning a tremendous amount both reading others work and producing mine. Amazing.
I know it's particularly difficult because of the contest format.
Normally, you would pause to catch an instant of natural life that your sharpened sensibility would capture, and from here or from the memory of this moment that reappears later, you would compose a haiku.
Generally, it happens to me as I walk, I ride a bicycle, I travel by train, rarely while driving. The compositional moment lasts a few minutes and is mental. As soon as I can, I write it in a notebook, sometimes making changes, sometimes not.
In the contest, however, the inspiring event is given by the photo, and it is not said that this photo has such an immediate and strong effect on your poetic sensibility, so you have to build on it with technique, so don't worry!