Hi Mina! Glad to see your first post. We could definitely have a conversation about forgiveness. I've a had a couple situations in my life that really forced me to reckon with it, as a concept, and how I choose to practice it. I like what you said about thinking of a 100 things worse than someone cheating on you. I agree, and it made me smile because I probably wouldn't have been able to say that when I was younger. I had a family member steal almost everything I owned to buy drugs once, and I honestly never really forgave. Its complicated.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read my post.
Yes! Complicated is an understatement!
I know this may sound like I’ve oversimplified, but I know with every neuron of my being that living simply, is the answer to everything. Especially with respect to mindfulness.
I think that it’s first good to go ahead and allow yourself to be angry about it. The anger is the fabric that binds the person(s) who hurts us to our form of punishment (be it silence, general distain, or actively being mean to them).
Eventually all those negative feelings...tear us up inside and spill into the lives of those who would never do such things. I think it’s important that we release them, unwrap them from the folds of guilt and transgression. Free them of your energy.
Not for them.
For you. For your family. For the wonderful people in your life...that...like I said, would NEVER be anything but a beautifully lit beacon in your life.
All that stuff weighs us down.
Release it all 🙌🏽
Update:
So I started to really pick apart this forgiveness thing, and I think that it’s a far more relative concept than to blanket our responses to our trespassers. Meaning, it all depends if the offense is something you can legitimately move past. In the sense of a cheating significant other, I can forgive. However, a pedofile - or in a case like yours where the offender doesn’t get help.
To forgive means we go back to the way it was. It never happened.
I’m sorry — but pedofiles should be monitored at all times and what they do to children - isn’t a wound that can heal fully. Therefore it’s nearly impossible to go back to the way it was.