I understand what you are going through @eveokonma.
@steemitbc, great work. Giving people the opportunity to talk about matters close to their heart here is commendable. Wow it feels good to know that people ranting here sre being offered advice, encouragement and support.
@eveokonma, Trust me, I have been there. I have gotten involved with toxic people, and betrayed my family's trust, and I know I don't deserve their support, but let me tell you something..I have tourettes, adhd, ocd, depression, among other things. Life will always be difficult for us with co-morbid conditions! but family is FAMILY, if they truly are family they will be there for you! You can earn back their trust, and put it in the past. live for tomorrow, not for yesterday. getting hospitalized is not a new thing for me, I have been there too, and trying lots of new medications is scary and who would want that? however, when your doctor prescribes something, you are old enough to research it and say "yes i want this" or "no, this is not right for me, my research says this, can we try this instead?" dont take any drug they prescribe, although you should trust your doctor, trust your research and intuition as well. i used to be on luvox for depression, since third grade, it made me happy, but i stopped cold turkey when i found out i could not orgasm on it, i forget what that condition is called. i ended up taking effexor, which is mood stabilizer and anxiety and depression medicine. it helps. you should go to therapy every month, a psychiatrist or neurophyciatrist, and most of all, get out of the house! volunteer at perhaps the humane society, im sure it will make you happy to see old dogs see the sunlight! you can meet people the more you are out...and if you have an episode or a break down with them, just admit ahead of time you strruggle with disorders, and if you do anything or say anything akward, to please forgive you. i am here if you need to talk, i know how you feel! i am 25, turning 26. ☺☺☺