I've been thinking about reputation a lot since I was flagged by a whale while posting a greeting saying you can qualify for project newbie if you verify. My "reputation" plummeted even though several who saw the comment said it was innocuous, even helpful, including the recipient. I worked with #steemprentice to create a plug for them that I could circulate as part of an effort to help new kids get FAQ. I'm now being asked if I would be willing to step up at project newbie. But I don't think I can make myself. The project newbie founder went to bat for me and got the flag removed and might even be able to repair the "reputation" I've come to think very little of. I don't understand why I can't just get over this.

It might be because I have wondered whether the real reason for the flag was that I have been a voice for transparency, which I have never understood the controversy around. My mind roams to various possibilities because there's been no valid explanation, just stating that my circulating of FAQ is spamming, which I find...lacking in clarity

. Suspicions can only build into rumors when there isn't open communication. Rumors create false information and build scintillation around it where transparency reveals facts. Facts are boring and when you talk about them and point them out, you seem pedantic. It is much less likely for suspicions to get blown out of proportion and overreacted to when people are openly discussing facts.

Can facts be openly discussed on Steemit? Can I tell people I might have lost esteem for the community without being called a complainer and told to shut up? It sucks that I can't just get over this. I want to get on the roller coaster with you and be a sane voice for kindness and community.

To me, transparency seems to be an absolute requirement for participation. I'm noticing this as true for myself, not thinking it in an theoretical way. As an editor and somewhat skilled communicator, I cannot understand being sure that something is incorrect but not caring enough to fix it. Why not just say "Hey, if you add this text (x) to this comment, you'll avoid any possibility of being flagged." An opportunity to help me hone a perfect message was missed. I don't understand why my reputation should be lowered because someone missed an opportunity to build community, because they lacked vision or were just lazy or, or? I feel voiceless and shot down. The reason I'm here saying so is that I want to put my power and heart behind Steemit. But do I dare demand an explanation, being so lowly, from someone so mighty? Risk being stomped down again, my reputation lowered further? It's too much drama. I'm going to my garden.