The depth of your loss is certainly not covered in this observation, @tony-marshall. This anniversary would be a sad one for you regardless.
No matter the situation it can feel lonely if not with friends and/or family in this season and many feels it emotionally.
My first official Christmas away from home was in Morocco. It was just another day, being a predominately Muslim country. The next year's Christmas was spent in Spain. With everyone celebrating around me it brought on a bad case of homesick. Beware of cultural brain wiring. 😎
It is more difficult when around everyone celebrating. I had to deal with it a lot when I was young boy and stayed that way. I was comfortable with it for many years to,l this accident happened. Now it's just a constant yearly reminder. It's been a while now and last few years I've made my peace with it. I still know but doesn't effect me as harshly as it once did.
Happy New Year, Brother! ✌
I wish u all the best