RE: Protecting our children from the damage done by schools
Interesting post - I feel for you and your son. It's such a difficult issue. I have a close relative who has been diagnosed with ADHD and put on medication. My gut feeling is that medication should be avoided as much as possible, especially at such a young age, and I have said this to the child's mother, though not in a dogmatic way, as I simply don't know. When I asked what the symptoms are, I've been told that he's really forgetful and so disorganised without it that he can't keep to a reasonable timetable, etc. I can't see that these are severe enough problems to require daily medication for life, especially given the possible side-effects.
However I know that some adults with ADHD say that they cannot function without their medication, and what do I know? I don't have kids. All I can say is that if medication had been given out so liberally when I was in my teens, I would have been on everything going, as I was a mess! But I managed to get a university degree and then go into years of full employment with no regular medication whatsoever.
As I've said, I could be wrong on this issue. It's a very difficult and complex one, and I don't want to be dogmatic about it. Some people do need medication, sometimes from a very young age. But I can't help feeling that a lot of kids are being drugged up to help them adapt to the increasing demands of the school curriculum.
It is a tough call re meds because each child is different. The meds they give you for ADHD are speed. In my sons case, the speed made him suicidal, but it did help him to concentrate better. School wanted him on it because they could control him better and he was producing more work, but I then had to deal with a suicidal and severely depressed child at night time when he crashed and burned coming down from the drugs. It is a common side effect unfortunately. There was no way I was going to trade his mental health for producing more work at school! Even though the school thought it was best to get other people involved! luckily the powers that could have taken him away from me, agreed that the best thing was exactly what I had done. I feel the school were pissed at this response and to try and punish us, they removed his in class assistance. I think school is a complete brainwashing waste of time if I am honest. I think kids should be able to learn about things that interest them, in a way that inspires them. But schools aren't equiped well enough to accommodate this. :/
It's been exactly the same scenario with my close relative, and your experience makes me suspect that my gut feeling is correct. It's been terrible to watch him going through these cycles of depression and suicide attempts, and his loving parents have been going through hell - yet it's his mother who has been insistent on him taking these drugs, because she is a health professional who has been trained in these methods. I have voiced my thoughts on this in a gentle and non-argumentative way on four separate occasions. I know that his mother wants only the best for him and is acting out of love. But sometimes you need to go with your gut.
When my mum was pregnant with me, she had morning sickness and she was prescribed Thalidomide. My grandmother, who had no education as she was employed as a mill worker from age 14 until her marriage, said to my mum, "Never take any medication during pregnancy". So my mum stopped taking the Thalidomide after a week. Apparently when I was born I had "funny feet" and had to wear built-up shoes for a few months, but that was all. Sometimes the official health advice is simply wrong.