I feel for you, I really do. I also understand what you mean by "No one understands". Though let me assure you that you are not alone and yes some of us do understand. I normally don't comment because right just typing this I am in so much pain I'm tearing up. You and I are the lucky ones though. We have family and friends that care. That try to help no matter how frustrating we are. Yes it feels like we are a burden to them and we curse ourselves for not being able to care for them as a parent should. But, they are the exact reason I keep fighting instead of just giving up. At least, in my case, they have come to accept that unless they think I'm dying I won't go to the hospital. I'm grateful they know when to override my stubbornness and call the ambulance. The last time I had been refusing to go to the hospital and they insisted I am glad they did. I had gone into septic shock and literally should have died. That was the third time in the past two years I should have actually died. We are here for a reason. What mine is I have no clue. However, I know for some cosmic reason I'm meant to be here despite all the pain. I also know the same is true for you!