That's right! I'm gonna be a daddy!
It's official now.
We learned, about 2 months ago now that my wife is pregnant with our first child. We were in the bathroom looking at the little baton when the "cross" appeared...announcing us that life was conceived and that the two of us will be three if all went well. (by the end of May)
I think that only guys who had that experience know how it feels. It's like a life vertigo, time stop, the floor seems to distance itself from your feet and you realize that life will never be the same. Kind of like this:
To be honest, it was a surprise and my wife promised herself in the past that she wouldn't get pregnant on the first year of marriage but hey, God has a weird to laugh at us and our plans.
I'm older than her and at 31, I gotta say that I'm very happy and excited that it's happening now. I don't want to be old with a walker when my kids will reach graduation day. Also, I'm at the top of my game when it comes to being in shape and financial situation. So, I'm not scared one bit about it.
Question to guys who went through that initiation
What would be your best recommendations for an expectant father? I'm new to this and I am pretty sure that there are a lot of you who have gone through that experience.
I'm curious to know what would be your top tips on how to survive and thrive in the first year of a newborn baby.
Leave your comment below and I'll upvote the best tips.
Coming from a fellow Fommy... Get your sleep in now because there won't be much those first couple months. Also, make sure you own a good rocking chair ;)
Fommy? 😊
Rocking chair will be essential. I'm a huge fan.
It sort of depends on who you are in real life. What you're naturally good at, what you believe, and how you relate to your wife.
But I think the most important thing is remembering that you're probably good enough. Parenting is going to be no-shit hard sometimes. Maybe it'll be going without sleep, or dealing with colic, or letting the daily stress and exhaustion interfere with your love-life, or dealing with it when your kid bites another at day-care, losing your temper and yelling when you shouldn't. You'll make mistakes and you'll lay awake at night beating yourself up about them. There's a lot of pressure to be perfect. When that happens, remember how old we are as a people and that we have things better than anyone ever has before and even as bad as our ancestors had it -- they made it! Their kids turned out mostly OK. Yours will too. Those screw-ups that you make, they're a great opportunity to learn to do better, but they're not going to be the end of the world. Take each one as an opportunity.
Also, even for sensitive modern guys, it's sometimes easy to slip into letting your woman do more than her fair share. Keep your eyes out for that. Make sure you're stepping up. And have conversations with her about it. My wife does more school-related parenting and I do more housework. That works for us, but wouldn't for everyone. Whatever it is, do it with intent and mutual buy-in. A near-term example: your wife will hopefully be nursing the baby, you can't. But you can be the one to put Baby back to sleep after it feeds.
And remember to have fun! Being a dad is an amazing, transformative experience.
Thanks for the tips. We stress way too much on being perfect indeed.
Congratulations it’s a very exciting time , and at first it may be overwhelming but the little moments you have to enjoy. I gave birth to my first baby 3 months ago and man it truly changes you and every time I talk to someone it’s always about him
Thanks @journeyoflife
Absolutely awesome news, congratulations man! I have a 5 year old son so I'll share a few things I've learned:
It's completely different for everyone. You'll get people telling you all sorts of different things that will or won't happen. That's how it happened for them and/or someone they know. Don't assume it will happen like that for you!
Every child is different and every parent is different, don't expect things to work out a certain way and most importantly don't try to force things to be the way you expected or wanted. Go with the flow and figure out what works best for your child and your family.
Be thankful every day that your child is healthy. As you go through the pregnancy and early months after your child is born you will learn about all of the things that can go wrong which can be devastating for families. I personally know people with children who have a range of disabilities and even terminal illnesses.
It really helps to put in perspective how lucky I am to have a healthy family and I try not to ever take that for granted.
Lastly - learn how to use your time wisely! The biggest change for me after having a child (and I only have one mind you - I don't know how people do it with more!) is that I have so much less free time.
When I look back I almost can't imagine how it used to be like when I didn't have a child and had all the time in the world to do whatever I wanted - and more importantly I think about how I wasted the vast majority of that time!
Now I realize how precious my time is and I try to be very deliberate about how I spend it - like, for instance, all of the time I spend here on STEEM - which I expect will definitely be worth it in the long run.
So again - congratulations! You're in for an awesome and wild ride!
5 star comment. Thanks for taking the time to share these tips. Every child is completely different and do have their own personalities we must negotiate with.
Congratz to you and your wife! 31 is a good age to have your first born.
I think so too. 😊
congratulations to you first.
my first tip is:
2.After the baby is born,buy your wife the best lingerie you can afford cos dressing up after delivery is pretty hard.bras dont fit,pants dont fit blouses noting fits.Actually that the best gift you can give your wife.
3.Constantly remind your wife that shes beautiful and not fat.Go with her to the gym.
Just enjoy each step of the way its pretty fun and youll learn a lot.
Congratulatios to the both of you again.
5 Star Comment. 😊 Thanks for the tips.
Congrats!
Even if you don't always live in Quebec make sure s/he learns French.
Congratulations. I have a 1 year old daughter and I can tell you that the experience is unlike anything else you've ever gone through in your life.
My advice to you is this:
OH SNAP! Congratulations to you two, may you have a health and happy babygirl or babyboy
Thanks. Still don't know which on it is.