Deep sleep part/1

It's been a long time... I still feel empty, my desire to continue is over, my hopes are over, I don't leave my house anymore and the truth is that I don't feel the need. I find myself in my room crying, crying for that great love, love I can't see, love I can't kiss, love that hurts me but the truth I don't want to forget, I try to see the light in the dark but... Who am I kidding? Clinging to this sad loneliness, broken dreams and untold truths, without enjoying my life thinking about what we could achieve, I will not stop thinking the truth I do not want to forget you, determined to continue hurting me, that is the sad reality.

My life is a fucking disgust, I can not hide that.

I live a reality of nightmares and evil, I can no longer sleep the truth I would not like to wake up, I do not want to live more, consuming narcotics to see if I can kill myself, I cling to scriptures, scriptures that I do not even want to publish, so people do not mock me and my sad reality, dreaming of seeing you again in this life or the other, dreaming of being able to kiss you even if life is short, I will always remember you ... With a sad note, I hope you do the same although my illusion is exhausted. Your absence hurts me please come back to be, I do not want to continue suffering I want this to stop now, I will be here lying without stopping thinking, without stopping dreaming even if I can no longer.
Listening to sad music but that's how I think about you more, because the last time I saw you you started singing, my accelerated heart made me start dancing that's the only thing I remember since I haven't looked at you again, I pressed a moment of light but it just vanished, I'll always remember you, please don't forget me. Your brown eyes that I can not stop seeing, I want to caress you again and feel like on Mars, make love to you with all the love I feel, look me in the eyes and tell me that this is just a dream.