Yup, I like that title much more.

I noticed the thing about the pompous words because I do it a lot (though I do it because I'm pretentious, and I do it in Spanish rather than in English). It can end up happening because of familiarity with other languages.

It's not strictly wrong and it plays into building a style, but you might end up typing "it was an obscure night" rather than "it was a dark night" and stuff like that... But hey, that's what the Block is there for, to help us aspiring artists improve.