Going into complete self-diminishment if I think and feel like I cannot change myself, how I experience myself, what I do, how and what I live as well as the decisions I make.
— A Mind Pattern

Are you familiar with this pattern or experience? Does it also form part of the patterns and experiences that govern you and your life? It’s a tough one for sure. A very self-destructive one also.

I am sure that this or a similar pattern, or ‘experience’ is part of many peoples nature of self and their living. I am struck by it as well. I am sharing the discoveries I have made about this pattern in my own research and introspection of it and how it exists in me and influences my living.

What does this pattern entail?

It’s when we accept and allow ourselves to go into a state of complete self-diminishment inside ourselves, accessing, participating in and accepting the emotions and emotional states of depression, helplessness, powerlessness, inferiority and giving-up when it comes to the emotional-, feeling reactions, the ups-and-downs of what we are experiencing and going through during an event or time in our lives.

We allow ourselves to go into a complete acceptance of: “I can’t and never will be able to be stable and have the tools, ability and strength to work effectively with my emotional and feeling reactions; I will never be at the point where I no longer feel like in a roller coaster and coming out of it at the end all destroyed and diminished inside myself”.

It’s like a parasite eating us up from the inside, slowly but surely.

Don’t write that s*** (erm.. I mean ‘stuff’..) in stone!

We have to see, realize and understand that within that very acceptance we are ‘dooming’ ourselves into a solidified self-definition. We get stuck in it and don’t move forward. We don’t move on. Why?

Have a look: Because I only see and perceive what I have accepted as “This is all I can do and am able to do, nothing more” and in that we stay in our limitations we have created through acceptance and self-definition.

There is always another way… A better way

We can ‘play’ this also another way. One that is much more in our favor. A way that benefits us in our process of self-creation and helps us expand ourselves and our lives. I propose: Instead see, realize and understand that if we allow ourselves to transform our starting-point of how we look at things, how we look at our emotional and feeling reactions, our instability regarding the mind and our reactions, From: Being problem-oriented (I like to call this stage ‘problem-stuck’, because we are literally stuck in our problems when we are only always ever seeing and focusing on our problems) - To: Being solution-oriented, and then muster up, search for or create any and all practical ways and methods to assist and support us with understanding our emotions and feelings, our programs, designs and patterns of the mind and how we create what we accept and allow. We push to find or create practical methods and applications we can apply and live in real-time moments to accommodate real-time self-change. We apply this corrective application over and over again. Every Time we find ourselves accessing our habits, patterns, designs and programs we are busy changing. We do that until we have changed ourselves in relation to and as that point, or those points that we are walking our process of self-change in regards to.

If you accept it, you have to live with it

When we already from the get go exist in a starting point and acceptance of “Oh, I can’t do this or that”, “Oh, I can or could never change this or that point in me, my mind, my programming” then this is what we set ourselves up for. This is what we define ourselves and our world as. It is what we accept as the limited reality of ourselves, the ‘I’, ‘Me’ and ‘Self’. In turn that is all that we then create and maintain as an accepted limited reality of ourselves and our abilities: Never expanding. Always just remaining stuck in unsupportive and self-diminishing subsets of self-definitions we accept as our truth and reality.

Conclusion

Let’s change our starting point, the ‘how we look at ourselves, our life, what we go through internally and externally in the world, From: Focusing mostly or only at the problem and being, literally, problem-stuck - To: Being solution-oriented. Pushing ourselves to always look for, find or create solutions for ourselves, our living and our life.

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Till then,
Steem-On,
Nebi :)