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RE: FROM THE DUST - PROLOGUE - PART ONE ~ THIS IS MY FIRST BOOK SO PLEASE OFFER UP YOUR SUPPORT!
Let it be written, let it be done, Sahib...
RE: Your Story
It reminds me of the setting of David Cage's "Detroit: Become Human".
And IMHO, for readability's sake, paragraphs should have different shapes and sizes. For example, some great writers can make one word become a paragraph.
Shit!
Is that hubris? Lol!
Namaste, Jaichai
I can see splitting some of the paragraphs up. Good idea and solid comment. I appreciate the feedback!
May you and yours be well and life life today, my friend.
Namaste, Jaichai
Thank you my friend! Your comment and feedback actually was very useful, as I stepped back to observe some other fine writer's work and took in examples of such. I will be editing my work to do just that. I cannot thank you enough for honest and constructive feedback!