Never Had I Ever… Before Children

Never Have I Ever: The entertaining (and slightly uncomfortable) way to learn about your friends

Remember the good ole’ days back in college, where you’d learn a lot about your friends through the drinking game Never Have I Ever? If you haven’t played it before, here’s the quick gist: You sit in a circle with your friends. One person starts it off by saying, “Never have I ever_____” and they fill in the blank with something they have never done, but others likely have. Those who have done that before have to take a drink.

For example: “Never have I ever gotten a tattoo”. Those that have a tattoo then take a drink. Typically the beginning of the game starts off pretty PG, but by the end of the game (and several drinks to your past) you find way more about your friends than you’d actually like to know.

In the past few years of raising my children, I often think back to this game and those “good ole’ days”. The game however has changed in my mind. I now think back to my life before children, and all the things that I had never done before they were here.

My “Never Have I Ever…” Before Children Version

Before children:

Never had I ever… let someone vomit into my hands.

Never had I ever… smelled multiple butts to see which one was poopy.

Never had I ever… wiped someone’s nose with my own shirt.

Never had I ever… had multiple people coming and going from my bed all night long.

Never had I ever… tasted someone’s hair to see why it was sticky.

Never had I ever… done a sneeze pee.

Never had I ever… hidden in the closet to eat candy (and then pretended I didn’t know where it went).

Never had I ever… wondered/smelled to see if something was chocolate or poop.

Never had I ever… popped balloons in the middle of the night.

Never had I ever… told someone to stop licking the floor.

Never had I ever… had so many naked people walking around my house.

Never had I ever… said “I’m still pooping” just to get 5 minutes alone.

Never had I ever… realized how messy a granola bar could be.

Never had I ever… had to schedule “me” time.

Before children:

Never had I ever… fed someone from my own body.

Never had I ever… gotten joy from brushing (or smelling) someone’s hair.

Never had I ever… been so happy to go out, and so excited to come back home.

Never had I ever… prayed so much.

Never had I ever… said “I love you” so many times a day.

Never had I ever… held back so many tears.

Never had I ever… cried so much.

Never had I ever… been the most important person to several people.

Never had I ever… been so proud of what I made.

The “never have I ever” stories in college were both enlightening and entertaining. Now a days, our “never had I ever” stories are told over wine at our family-friendly dinners. We may have grown up, but the stories often still involve bodily functions, naughty behaviors, and lessons learned. Never had I ever… realized how much would be trusted to me as a mom.

What are your “Never Had I Evers” before having children? Share your juiciest ones below (juicy like Never had I ever… realized there’s a proper way to hold a juice box kind of juicy).