“Dare to be truthful. Dare to articulate yourself, and express (or at least become aware of) what would really justify your life.” - Jordan Peterson

Not Enough Caffeine to See Where I Should Aim.

I can officially say I've had caffeine. For the first time in my 19 years of existing, I've had enough caffeine to reap its effects and figure out whether or not I like it.

Then again, it was only black tea and green tea, which, in retrospect to Coffee, has very little caffeine. 

But whatever.

I didn't get tired at work, so that's a good thing! Maybe I should stick to the tea. It tastes like nothing and it doesn't cost a thing!

That's enough for my rambling. You do know that this section is basically my daily thoughts, right? Just going over what I've done, etc?

Yeah?

Cool. 

Onward we go.

Stats

Habit: Reading

Date: 12/02/2018

Currently Reading: 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos

Previously Read: N/A

Pages Read Today (Minimum 10): 26

BOTD

Source

We're now on chapter 4! Honestly, I would have liked to cut the chapter up into pieces so I wouldn't have to take photos of the thumbnail, but because of the simplicity and truth of the chapter, I just swept through it all.

26 pages down. An additional 16 pages, where my original goal was just 10 pages a day.

Like everything else, imagine what would happen if you kept up with this habit and let it grow exponentially?

We all like to think that. Especially with money. Let's not lie to ourselves now.

Chapter 4: Compare Yourself To Who You Were Yesterday, Not To Who Someone Else Is Today

Aim Small.

This chapter proved to have a lot of questions. There was no personal anecdote to relate to because we are talking about ourselves, we are focusing on our lives and what is best for us.

"The future is like the past. But there's a crucial difference. The past is fixed, but the future - it could be better. It could be better, some precise amount - the amount that can be achieved, perhaps, in a day, with some minimal engagement."

Much like in the book, 'The Slight Edge', there are only two ways to go with life. Up or down. You can't stagnate, you don't simply walk on a flat line throughout life.

You're either up or down.

Out of the two, which one would you prefer?

Simple, yeah? It should always be up unless you are some sort of masochist.

If you stop you're going down. But if you take baby steps, no matter how small, you're beating out the gravity which pushes you down.

When you compare yourself to others, you are only comparing a singular skill, a singular factor in their life and basing it against all of your life. There's nothing fair about that.

The sooner you realize that you can't compare yourself to others and it's a waste of time and energy, the better. 

Ever since I was young I used to think like this - When I needed to decide something which was particularly difficult, I would consult my emotions, all different types of Cate(s) at a round table, each acting out how they would if I were to feel that emotion. I would be there, hovering around, listening to what they had to say as an unbiased third party.

From there I would collect what is most useful, what I think is right and proceed with that.

How does this relate?

Because I also have other me(s) that I compare myself to. Caitie, my younger self. Cate, me. Caitlin, me in the future.

The only goal I have is to be Caitlin. Caitlin is who I want to be. She's the target I aim at.

Caitie is my past, yes, but also someone I have to impress. I want to be proud of myself as if I had a younger sibling being proud of me, looking up to me as their role model.

A bit selfish I must say, but that's just how it goes for me.

So how do we figure out where to aim?

 “You must decide how much of your time to spend on this, and how much on that. You must decide what to let go, and what to pursue.”

Priorities. It's such a pain. This whole entire chapter had questions which I would type out, but it would be half of this post. It's something you need to set aside a few hours for, to really sit down and contemplate. I've been meaning to, but I've been pushing it out further, focusing on my current habits which, although they are useful, would not be as helpful if I were to just sit down and think.

There's only so much we can focus on. If we aim one place, we will miss out on the others. We cannot keep everything within our scope.

There are just some threads that we have to cut.

“This will only work, however, if you genuinely want your life to improve. You can’t fool your implicit perceptual structures. Not even a bit. They aim where you point them. To retool, to take stock, to aim somewhere better, you have to think it through, bottom to top. You have to scour your psyche. You have to clean the damned thing up. And you must be cautious because making your life better means adopting a lot of responsibility, and that takes more effort and care than living stupidly in pain and remaining arrogant, deceitful and resentful.”

“What could I do, that I would do, to make Life a little better?”

Let it sit and stir. The answer never comes in an instant, so why should you expect it to come? The brain works even when you're asleep. If you truly contemplate a question, it'll be mulled over and your subconscious will talk to you, even if you're not aware of it.

It's like saying listen to your heart. Heh.

Anyhow!

Another day is done!

Thanks for joining this ride! I hope you’ve enjoyed it thus far. 

Tell me what you think of the book at its current stage! What are your thoughts on the quotes given and questions raised?

And don’t forget to follow if you’d like to see more updates and thoughts from me,

C8!

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