You've written quite a story. Many people have a difficult upbringing and it can be very hard to recover; in fact it is a lifelong pursuit for people who have experienced abuse and trauma. But never give up. You have only this one life. I challenge you to decide how you can make it great. Believe in yourself, but remember to think outside your personal challenges. Find community. And make sure you get the right medication for your condition. Have you thought of turning your stories into fiction writing? It might be a nice way to channel your PTSD.