The Idea of Use and Dump. As A Lady, You Have To Stop Being A Cheap Commodity That Will Be Consumed And Rendered Useless. You Are Priceless, Yes I Said You Are.

in #women7 years ago

There are things that never cease to amaze me and I can't just help but wonder why those things happen the way that they do. I am a Lady and I am very proud to be one, but I have noticed that the way some ladies think can be really questioning.

A friend came to visit and she came along with a lady who was crying, my friend said she did not want to leave her alone at home so that she will not hurt herself and that is the reason why she decided to bring her to my place.
I became interested in the issue and the Lady told me that there was a guy she liked but she just saw that he was getting married to someone else next week.

She was really crying as she lamented about being an object that men have used and dumped on several occasions. I became interested in her case, so I sat close to her and I pleaded with her to stop crying, but she went further, this is not the first time, you will not understand. I was getting interested, I wanted to know more, so I pleaded with her to please tell me more about the whole issue, and this was how the whole conversation went:

Me: So tell me for long have you been in a relationship with him?

Lady: We have been dating for a month now.

Me: But, did you have any idea that he was in a relationship with someone else?

Lady: Yes, I know he has been dating this girl for five years, he told me that he loved her because she was there for him when he had nothing and he cannot live her for any reason because she is all that he has.

Me: So, why did you still go into a relationship with him, since he told you all that?

Lady: I liked his look, I wanted to have a feel of his body and I know he had money to spend on me as well.

Me: And did you succeed at that?

Lady: Yes I did, I knew that it might be very difficult to make him sleep with me so I came in as a friend and we started becoming intimate gradually until I was able to meet him in a secluded area, I seduced him and he fell. After that, he started avoiding me and I tried all that I could to make us come back, I apologized for everything and I told him it will never happen again and I wanted the friendship to remain.
He agreed and I did everything possible to seduce him again, although it was even more difficult this time but he eventually fell for it and I was very happy after that. He cried that day because immediately we had what we had, his girlfriend's call came through and he was not even able to pick up the call. I watched his hand shake and his eyes filled with tears as the phone rang.

Me: But, that was not fair at all, you were hurting him to make yourself happy.

Lady: All I wanted was to satisfy my urge of sleeping with him and I was sure that I will be able to make little money for my makeup and clothes from him.

Me: But since you have achieved your aim, why the tears?

Lady: I thought he might eventually love me more, because I have a better shape than her and I am even more pretty, but after all I did, he still went ahead to marry her and the most painful part is that, he is not the first person that will jilt me like that.

Me: (smiles) okay please tell me about the man before him.

Lady: He was a friend too, (I like being friends to good looking and rich young men) but he was married. He needed someone to pass time with because he was having an issue with his wife, so I made myself available and we had a nice time.
I thought it will continue like that because we had great time in bed, until he told me he did not want to have anything to do with me again, he even told his wife about me and she picked his call one day when I tried calling, she told me I was just a one time thing and she does not want to ever see me call her husband again.

Me: With everything you have said, whose fault do you think it is?

Lady: I know I am very beautiful and I am also good in bed, so I should be able to get any type of man that I desire and I do not like to go for those guys who are still struggling because they cannot pay my bills, it is just that those who are successful already are either married or in a serious relationship.

Me: So you think that your beauty or your skills in bed can make a man get committed to you? there are issues in life that require a good life partner, relationships are not just about sex, what if he needs advise, what if his business is going down and he wants someone to talk to, if all a guy wants is sex then he can easily get a sex doll, so get something else to offer.

My sincere advise to you is that, the moment you see that he is in a relationship, just look somewhere else, you have no idea what it took the Lady to make him the person he has become, you have no idea how much sacrifice she has made, and if you think that your skills in bed will make him leave his wife or girlfriend for you, be certain my dear that you will have to contend with someone else who has a greater skill in bed.

You can always make yourself proud by looking for ways to make money for yourself and make yourself someone of importance rather than just looking for someone who will pay your bills in exchange for your body, that makes you a slut. Please have a re-think and stop ruining people's relationships, if you keep doing that, a thousand ladies will ruin yours when you think you want to get settled eventually.

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..............It's your Nigerian Lady @Oluwatobiloba.

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So sad whenever I hear about how this phenomenon happens over and over again in society.. In my recommendation o, basically knowledge has a very great role to play in solving this societal menace. There has to be a kind of rehabilitation and reorientation out there to people both men and women, that love is about "Value" and should be so guided, and that manipulation or abuse speaks nothing of smartness or gain, but only is a killer to both the abuser and the abused, knowingly or unknowingly. A Revolution is needed in our society, especially as regards relationship /love matters !
-@yowanetwork

I agree with you on this one, we hope for a better society with deeper understanding.

@oluwatobiloba, I won't lie to u, I wasn't able to read the post all through. She almost ruin another person's life for her own gain. It saddens me to read or hear story of people like that expecially the ladies.

Girls mostly her after their own happiness and pursue relationship for materials things a guy can offer. That is why they are heavily subjected to the treachery act of yahoo guys.

If you doesn't value yourself, you will find yourself disrespected.

That is the point, self- value is greatly required.

Funny how some women think. Hurting someone to make yourself happy and lamenting when karma pays back.
We females should give ourselves that respect and pride.You can't be presenting yourself as an object and expect not to be used.
Thanks for sharing @oluwatobiloba,this is so real and insightful.

Thank you @marvettsy, as females we need to give ourselves value.

Exactly.You are welcome

The lady has really missed her step. She her define goal is the unrealistic one. No hardworking and sensible man will take beauty or sex machine as wife. She actually put herself in a difficult situation and she was lucky the issue is not more than heartbroken.
You have rightly given her the best advice...
I will also add this few lines

She first need to define her essence of living
She needs to know the difference between love, happiness and sex
She needs to look away from people riches and wealth.
She should get something doing with her life that will help her in building her future and career.
Then i had advice her to seek counsel and advice in other to change her orientation about life and relationship

Thanks a lot @fadiji09, this is really going to be helpful.

I'm tripped that there are ladies like this one, so narrow minded and completely self centered. Na wa o. I hope she listened to you for real!

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