Weekend freewrite 3/10/19

Spring rolled around and it occurred to me that I hadn't been home in two years. My mind was so full of chaos and such, attempting to just make it through one week at a time, which led to months and then some. I find myself sitting here wishing the birds would start singing, and flowers start blooming even if it kills my allergies. I was talking with a friend and then when I looked at the date, I mean really looked at it, I asked where the heck did time go? We were talking about the younger years with the kids and events that went on. This is so weird and crazy how time can get away from us with just the blink of an eye. Makes me wonder what the next couple years will be like. Spring is the best time of year to me. Means not as much cold weather, or snow, or heavy rains depending on where you live. Have you ever planned a picnic or hike for Spring just to have to cancel it due to heavy rains?
Then this job we do is insane. I tried to reason with them. "If I get into bed with you guys, I lose my clients." I can't do something that I know isn't right or feel right. I hate sucking up just to get all the income they can give me. Other people who do the same work have others to fall back on, but not me. I thought I could never stoop low enough to sleep with someone for the money. But, now that I think about it, would I really have the guts to do it if everything depends on it? My subconscious mind doesn't play games. My mouth drools over the idea of all that money in my hands. Well, it will be short lived in my hands since I have a crap-ton of bills to dish said money out to. I wonder if I could make bank if I went out on my own. You know, as a call-girl, or a chauffeur per say.
Far back in the tunnel of love is where my heart stops. I don't have time to fall for something or someone. Well ok, that is not all true. I can fall for someone, as long as we have an understanding that everything is done as a team. This world is insanely crazy and in order to make it we need someone by our side. I have learned to shrug things off but sometimes it may not have been a good idea because things can and do pop up when you least expect it. Like this story that I am doing right now. I have or had no idea where it was taking me. I just went with the flow that my fingers were taking. None of the stuff in here is true. Well maybe a few things. I don't even recall my writing this much with any prompts. Lucky you whoever is reading this. Do you notice this is all just ramble at the end? I bet you even chuckled while reading this last prompt. Who's idea was it? (Lucky you that time is up)