Thank you for posting your story, it is a strong thing to do and a step in the right direction to feeling better again. I do not know anything about you or about your story except for what I can read in your poem, but I know that millions have overcome depression and I know that you can do so to!

Remember the things that used to make you happy and try doing some of them again even though you do not feel like doing them. Go out on walks or do some form of exercise daily and if possible in nature. If you have any friends or family you can talk to - do it! And if you cannot talk to them about your depression, try to gather the strength to spend time with them anyways, just to get out from your house. Try to make a routine if you do not have any and force yourself to stay awake during the light hours. I know that you will probably not feel like doing any of these things, but that is the depression talking and you can overcome it if you decide to no longer believe in the evil things it is whispering to you.

It will take time, but each day you go out for a walk your body will become a bit stronger, and as your body becomes stronger you will start feeling more energetic. Make small goals, that way you will not give up as easily. And do not punish yourself if you do not succeed immediately, be patient - you will get there.

A possible deficit of iron, magnesium, b vitamins, d vitamins and many more can also make your depression worse so it might be a good idea to check those up. And try to eat regularly and drink a lot of water. Taking care of your body really is a good start to feeling better mentally.

If you have the strength and can afford it, I encourage you to seek up a therapist. There are many good ones out there and in my experience nothing helps as much as talking about your problems. There is also online therapy available if you do not feel ready to meet with a therapist in person, but I do recommend traditional therapy since the social experience is important. If you suffer from overthinking or anxiety, you can also try guided meditation videos on YouTube.

Now I realize that I do not know much about you, and you might have already tried all these things. But keep on trying, look for new solutions, and try! Because suicide is the worst imaginable option, it only takes your pain and passes it on to everyone you ever cared about.

You can and you will do this! And one day you will look back to this time in your life and you will have learned a great deal from it. And it will help you help others that are in the same position. Do not give up!

The voiceshares community is here for you so do join our discord! It is a lot easier to help when chatting or talking, and we would all like to be your friend!

The day will come when you no longer feel as miserable, then the day when you will laugh and with time you will feel happiness again. You are strong and you will find your way back!