European Time Slip - Berlin Travelogue 2018 Pt 1

One of the tricky things about travelling to Europe from Phoenix is the 9-hour time difference. Not so much for the jet lag (which in my experience is worse going back home, where it doesn't matter because I can just fall asleep on the couch whenever) but for lining up accommodations. Coming from the west coast of the US, you're in for roughly 15 to 20 hours of travel, and it is difficult to plan an arrival in the afternoon. This isn't such a big deal except that it is damn nigh impossible to get in to a hotel in Europe before 3pm.

So your choices, in my experience, unless you drop ludicrous amounts of money for a direct flight, are:

1. Leave at an ungodly early hour, arrive equally early, stumble about your destination in a stupor for the day until you can get in your hotel.

2. Leave late in the evening, arrive in the afternoon, and accept a couple days of sleepless nights.

I tried #2 last year, and it worked pretty well. This year, I thought I'd give #1 a shot again, so I left Phoenix at 5AM, and arrived in Berlin at 7AM the following morning. (Which was about 10PM the same day by my internal clock.) I flew on United for a change, because I've heard good things about their new Polaris business class service. Those good things were written by people that had far different experiences than I did. A three hour layover in Newark largely consisted of visiting the various United lounges and muttering to myself about Fucking Newark™, Fucking United™, or combinations thereof. The only good thing I can say about that is that I was able to leave. The much-touted Polaris Business Class was pretty ratty on the 767-400; lots of plastic pieces that didn't quite fit together, lukewarm food, and a funnel-shaped bed. The pillow was pretty good. The flight crew hadn't quite figured out a 2-1-2 seating arrangement, so I got asked every single question twice, having one of the "1" pods.

(Yeah, I just spent an entire paragraph complaining about a sleeper cabin on an airplane. Entitled much?)

Anyhoo, arrived in Berlin safe and sound. I can't say the same for my luggage; all the wheels got torn off one of my suitcases. Luckily, it was the one with my clothes in it, and not the one with all the electronics for our Superbooth display. Quite frankly, I'm afraid to set everything up to make sure it works. I'll do so tomorrow. I dropped my bags off at the hotel, where the clerk once again informed me that 15:00 is when check-in is, and I'm pretty sure I heard her say "fucking Americans" as I walked away. It was now 9AM, and I found myself with six hours to kill. So I went to a flea market and bought an entire 1970s tea service in bone china, because IT WAS FULL OF WHIMSY. The woman selling it didn't speak a word of English, and I didn't speak a word of whatever it is she spoke, so I'm pretty sure I haggled her up from her original price. I then took this tea service back to the hotel, and had them store it with my luggage. Because that's the kind of American I am.

My hotel is right next to the Friedrichstrasse station. I can hear the groans from my Berlin-based readers now. They're the same exact groans I make when someone tells me they're staying in a hotel in Times Square. Not many Germans in this neighborhood, suffice it to say. Mostly overweight English (of the "I LOVE FOOTBALL OI OI OI" sort), svelte Italians (of the "ciao...." sort), and old Americans and Canadians (of the "oh, look, it's a boat" sort.) But the hotel itself (the Leonardo) is very nice, and their breakfast buffet is the nicest I've ever come across. And that's saying something, as I've spent nearly a third of my life on tour, and know a thing or two about Continental breakfasts. And there's mass transit right there, to everywhere else, so I don't need to spend much time in the immediate area.

Anyhow, I was able to sleep the entire night by virtue of having been awake for 25 hours straight, and taking 200mg of melatonin and two Benadryl right before bed (since I never take either, that pairing essentially induced a 10-hour coma.) I'm now about to venture forth to hit some more flea markets, and get my usual field recordings and photos. If I see anything FULL OF WHIMSY I can't promise I won't buy it.