My Cruise to Jamaica, Cayman Islands, Cozumel - Problem factory / Traveling is overrated.
- infinite planning
- spend a ton of money
- stress about packing
- stress about logistics of making it to the boat on time
- stopped by TSA security for random screening
- wait around for 20 minutes while they fondle my phone
- barely get to flight on time, miss any chance of a decent breakfast
- infinite turbulence and babies screeching, no chance for sleep
- pilot decides to fly in circles for 30 minutes outside the landing area
- off the plane and the bus is leaving in 5 minutes half a mile away
- make it to the docks, baggage guy demands a tip to 'keep luggage safe'
- wait in infinite line to go inside the boarding area
- wait around for boarding zones
- mine is called, get into infinite line to get on the boat
- go through 15 layers of security all asking for the same things
- get on the boat an hour later, go for food to find everyone else does the same
- wait in line for 2 hours to get food
- food is weaponized bread and soggy prison slop, at least the plates have cool patterns
- most interesting places on 10th floor, my room on 1st floor
- all the elevators are either broken or reserved for crew
- overhear someone mention crew leaves bags outside the rooms
- go to my room to find bags are missing
- spend rest of the day recovering my luggage at guest services
- sleep on a bed that feels like it's made of bricks, the carpet would have been a better choice
- first day at sea I enter into art contest, I win $200 in auction bid prizes
- turns out the entire thing was a scam to lure me into bidding before saying the vouchers are invalid
- arrive at Jamaica the next day, my excursion for ziplining has been cancelled
- decide to roam around outside the port, constantly harassed by locals trying to sell me stuff
- arrive at Cayman Islands next day, scuba diving excursion has been cancelled
- last minute book a trip to swin with stingrays at the sandbar, costs a fortune
- get out to sandbar and boat captain spends 35 minutes trying to anchor alongside the other boats
- by the time we get into water we have 15 minutes remaining to stay at sandbar
- leave and sit for 30 minutes again listening to obnoxiously loud island music on the boat ride back
- captain waiting on the dock insultingly expecting a tip
- next day arrive at Cozumel, excursion planned for Mayan ruins amazingly not cancelled
- turns out the ruins are tiny and have swarms of mosquitos on the scale of a biblical plague
- over half of the tour is a speech about the giftshops, eaten alive by mosquitos listening to sales pitch
- finally escape the tour, met by hyperaggressive shop owners everywhere else
- politely mention I leave my money on the ship, they suggest I trade for my shoes and watch
- fight my way through mandatory shopping strip to back on the ship to eat
- realize the abstract art on the plates isn't art at all, it's crusty food, all the dishes are perpetually dirty
- a couple days of nonsense passing time at sea, can't wait to leave
- get off the ship and repeat the nightmare of getting on the ship in reverse, TSA included
- realize it costed thousands of dollars to go through hell
- deep feeling of regret
follow me, I post things sometimes
^_^
My cruise to Jamaica
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Saved a lot of money, but never made it
lol :D
You just need to raft harder!
great post!
Sounds terrible. Never been on a cruise ship. I thought they were better than that....Good advertising no doubt!
Thanks!
WOW what a nightmare, maybe my wife is right in being adamant to never go on a cruise
She is. Listen to your wife! This posts triggers me to remember the two miserable times I was stuck on a floating nightmare. Take one of my memories and pretend it is yours. The only possible good idea is a long established and highly expensive river cruise, but even then, the locals are waiting for you.
I never liked cruise ships- you just reminded me, never to take a trip on one. Thank you
Wow, the reality of cruise travel, it's not as glamorous as we thought.
You took alot of Bullets man, but your still kicking.
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Simple.....travel with Royal Caribbean, absolutely no comparison, way superior. Same journey was brilliant. We docked in Cozumel at the same time as a Carnival Cruise and heard the horror stories. We had a fantastic time.
Wow...you have more experiences travaling to carribian islands with cruise ship.it's fantastic experence in our life.thanks sharingfor your knowladge with us.GOD BLESS YOU. Thanks.
Sounds horrible.