The Silent Struggle: A Journey of Suffering, Choices, and Self-Discovery

There are quiet, silent separations. And then there are those you don't want but have to endure. The memories you see and pause upon while saying goodbye, which you must carry in your heart for a lifetime. Tears that you think will eventually stop falling, but rise like a wave from within you at the slightest reminder, consuming you.

Oh, the most difficult cycle of my unfortunate life,
The silent screams cast without a witness,
An endless weave between life and death,
Suffering, torment, and many more.

Why do we make the choices we do; are they learned decisions or ones we must make? Are they made to shape us, or are they penance for our mistakes? If there is a God who sees and oversees everything, why does He allow us to suffer?

As always, walking down the road, looking ahead, and fighting. Like in every religion, is rising to the heavens our path to ascension? Is every torment we endure, every painful feeling we grow within, forming a new self our spiritual ascension?

Perhaps some questions can never be answered correctly. The answers vary according to each person's beliefs, experiences, and the emotions formed from those experiences. What, then, is the truth?

Is it the search itself? As Mevlana Jalaluddin Rumi said:
"If you are seeking a soul, you are a soul; if you are seeking a morsel of bread, you are bread.
If you are seeking a drop of water, you are water; if you are seeking cruelty, you are cruel.
If you are seeking love, you are a lover. Whatever your heart is captivated by, you are that.
If you understand this nuance, you understand the matter:
Whatever you seek, you are."

What are we seeking in our lives, and are we becoming what we seek? May we be among those who seek love.

06/27/2024
Emre Başkurt