How Long Does the Struggle Take?

in #struggle7 years ago

We have all heard it in one way or another. #TheStruggleIsReal

We all have problems, we all undergo seasons in our lives where we wished we can just move forward to the better days, to the high times, to the season where we atleast know that we are in the right place and the right time. For some of my friends (I included, but not the focus), it is the #BlessedSingleLife, to some, it is more complicated than that. There are times I wish being a student again, that though yes it is an arduous season but atleast you have a definite timeframe or term to watch out for. You know when a new semester is upon you. You know when to step up your game or enjoy the moment. Even in med school or law school, you know there are definite seasons. Being a full-time entrepreneur, it’s prepare for everything and hope you enjoy it along the way.

Recently, whenever I hear stories of successful people or I see busts of great people who have left legacies to ponder at, I would somewhat question how long did they struggle? What were they thinking in the middle of all the uncertainties and insecrurities they were facing. I had the privilege of talking to this seasoned businessman and was able to ask him about this question. He answered that it was not a struggle for him because he already knew what to do and he just needed to go through the process. What made his experience differ from mine is that he was raised up to be an entrepreneur. He told me that during dinnertime when he was younger, his father would mention about people-how they acted, what they did right and wrong, what they should have done that even without proper education on business, he became hard-wired for it. Hence he struggled less.

The struggle would always be the learning curve. I cannot say that this is a fact but I have come to gradually realize this. It just so happens that I keep on learning hence I would always struggle. Before, there were thoughts that as long as we are able to accomplish this and that, the next steps will be easier. Or because we were already able to overcome this and that, we can handle the rest. Partly yes, but there will always be things you are not able to prepare for. No matter how “seasoned” you feel you already are. There will always be experiences that would just leave you to question “Why did I even do this in the first place?”

Support Groups are essential to the Struggle. I feel I had a stronger support group when I was in college. Atleast I was always around people who would encourage me and we would more or less struggle with the same thing (acads and balancing everything else). But as I started working and finally being a full-time entrepreneur, I realize more than ever the need for these consistent social circles. But of course due to the nature of the work, there will always be schedules you cannot block off in order to meet with people who edify you. So you try to squeeze in a lunch date with a friend here or a spontaneous meet up there- anything so you can just have a physical person to tell stories to. To some extent, I envy some of my entrepreneur friends because they live with their family. They atleast have people to take care of them when they’re hungry or sick. Sometimes I question why I even aspired for the independent life in the first place. Of course it comes with alot of liberty but it also comes with alot of loneliness which you try to fill in with meet ups, work and alot of thinking.

The struggle is always greatest now. Whenever I do talks to students, I would mention that the hardest part of your life is normally where you are at right now. Take for example when you were in first grade, the hardest part was spelling out your name and you struggled with it but now, you just laugh it off. I believe where you are at will always be the hardest part of your life and all you have to do is overcome. How to overcome comes in alot of forms and there is no one answer to that but the point is the struggle does end. In one way or another it does. Some longer than others but it does still end.

Just to sum it up, I still don’t know how long the struggle takes. Previously I had thoughts that as long as I still need to learn something, the struggle is relevant. Or that it is my fault why I keep on struggling because I don’t learn from what I need to learn from, and it haunts me until I deal with it. Maybe there are nuggets of wisdom in both ideas. Of course I can’t prove any of it. I’m basically just thinking out loud. I would’ve wanted to make a vlog about it but maybe a written blog was more appropriate. All I know is that the struggle does end in one way or another. Sometimes we don’t even realize it. And we are not defined by our struggles, or for how long we struggle with them. We are not even defined by how we succumb to them when we let them or how we are overcome by them at times. I cannot say it becomes easier. I cannot say it becomes harder. All I know is that we continue to learn, we continue to grow. And maybe after some time with God’s unending grace, what we have learned will be enough to help us overcome or endure for the long haul.

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