I do not know how to learn to understand men and not lose their heads

Perhaps it's only I consider this story to be a "love story" ...

We lived in the same house and never communicated, but in high school I began to meet with his friend and so we met ... at the meeting only exchanged a few words ...

school was over ... everyone left to study in different cities, we did not see each other, did not communicate, I got married, gave birth to a child, he went to work abroad and there he stayed ... 10 years later ... he found me in social networks and we began to be friends ...

at that time I was already divorced and as it turned out he too .. it was very easy to communicate and one day he said that he would be in Ukraine and we can meet ... it all happened .. we walked ... talked .. there was that more than sympathy ...

we spent the night together, although for me this is unacceptable at the first meeting, but it was so easy ... I told myself that it was just a great time and I did not need to give vent to feelings .. but he again wanted to meet, we were still a few days before he left together ... and now it seemed necessary to descend to the ground ... but he began to say that I had changed something in him and that soon we will meet again somewhere in a more romantic place ...

we talked on skype .... phone ... we did not hesitate to share our fantasies ... and after 2 months he invited me to warm countries for a date .. it was so romantic that I wanted to cry with happiness ... I again could fall in love, but it seemed that I could not believe anyone ... a month passes and he invites me to meet abroad with him and his friends together a new year, a holiday that for me was the most beloved and fabulous ... this is the limit of dreams - New year with your beloved ...

already at the holidays, I felt that he treated me more coldly when I returned home to Ukraine, he went to another country ... tears poured by themselves, there was a strange feeling inside, I could not imagine that he might not love me and I asked "has something changed?", but he replied that I was thinking it all out, I believed him, a week passed and he wrote to me that he can not deceive me and he has another ...

since then a week has passed .. I'm very hurt ... every night I take myself in for sports so that I do not have the energy for unnecessary thoughts ... but in the morning it's harder, if I wake up, then I can not fall asleep, the thought is only that the loved one is more not with me ...

in the beginning it seemed that the pain was due to hurt self-esteem and maybe I did not like him, I tried to be angry and hate him, but I realized that I just had time to fall in love and even started to justify him ... a misunderstanding of why this romance with his hand ... let the first date ... it was time to get to know me, but the New Year together ... it was cruel ... I was ready for a lot for him, even if he said that he would come to live with me, on Ukraine and he has no money, I would have loved him also with all his advantages and disadvantages when we met It was so easy to communicate with him, as if with a friend who knew everything about me .. I do not know how to learn to understand men and not lose my head .. I hoped if I write will become a little easier ...