My Love and Pain

As I met one guy (on the Internet), I was always amused by such acquaintances. You meet a man but you do not see him, you do not hear his voice. For me, not when there was not a problem to get acquainted with a guy and most of them I did not even like. I met with them for fun, so they were my living toys. And this guy was another toy but there were days I fell in love with him.

And one fine morning I woke up completely happy. It was raining at night and there was a nice smell of wet asphalt outside the window that filled the room. I turned on the computer and, as usual, began to correspond with him, he made me go eat. But closer to dinner I went to his page (we had passwords from each other's pages) and saw that he did not have time to delete, he changed me ... It hurts ... I deleted the page. Two days I cried. I sat on the bed and cried and when I did not cry, I sat and stared stupidly at one point for two hours. And so on a circle ... I did not what did not eat. Only sometimes I went to the kitchen to drink. And when I came back into the room I could not even reach the bed - I fell in the middle of the room and cried. I could not commit suicide. I tried but every time I survived ... And that's why every night I was lying in the middle of the room and gasping for tears I prayed to God for death ... It went on for a long time but then I liked the guy but I did not work with him either.

And so, on New Year's Eve, I decided to congratulate the traitor, but his brother answered me and I remember these lines now. "Garik is dead." No, I did not cry. I just did not realize what was happening. And only in the evening I lay down on the bed and began talking to him . I was like a mentally ill person. Many say that time heals. It's not like that ... It's been a year since it's possible anymore. The pain does not go anywhere. You just learn to live with it. Hide from everyone. But it does not go away, it lives in you. Always…