WHO STOLE MY PENIS? (Prologue)

"Life's a bitch."

I swear to God, whoever first said those words was probably the wisest man on earth.

But why is life a bitch?

I guess you'll find out soon enough.

I grew up lacking nothing. And I admit, lacking nothing is kinda fun, but my fun was dampened by the fact that I felt something wasn't right.

I'm a man now. Pretty wife, twin daughters and a yacht that puts Steve Jobs' to shame. So what was missing? What is still missing?

Oh, I know!

My penis.