How do we get more votes and followers on Steem? Asking for an upvote, a follow, a resteem, or a witness vote in an appropriate context helps a lot to because often the difference in getting a vote versus not getting a vote is asking. We each must feel safe asking for what we need because most of us want to earn enough to make Steem at least a hobby if not part time or full time.

Meanwhile, we often are unaware of the needs of others because we do not hear them or we see them expressed in inappropriate ways we would not want to do ourselves. Simply voicing these needs makes a big difference. With many of us having never been told the most appropriate ways to ask for upvotes, witness votes, follows, and resteems, what right do we have to complain if we see requests not meeting unspoken expectations? I hope this post helps share situations where asking for upvotes, follows, resteems, witness votes, and anything else is appropriate!

Examples where asking for upvotes, follows, resteems, and witness votes IS appropriate.

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1. Asking for anything at the end of a post is always appropriate because readers made a choice to view our post and we need upvotes and follows to earn on Steem. An ideal ask begins with "Would you please [insert request] because" followed by a reason such as "I am hoping to do Steem full time and every vote helps with that" or "I have $200,000 in student loans and your upvotes will go directly to those payments" or any other relevant reason. The more honest and personal, the higher response we are likely to get. Funny reasons can also work. For example, "Would you please upvote this post because I have an endless desire for money that for a moment you can satisfy with an upvote?" The key in asking this way is making it safe for readers to say no or to not take the action. I ask a lot and I get told no a lot. I also get told yes a lot too :)
2. Replying to a comment on our own post or comment with a request to follow, upvote, resteem, vote for witness, or anything else logical is appropriate in a post made by the author or in a reply to our comment on another author's post. By comparison, it is NOT appropriate to use methods such as bots or copy and paste brute force posting all over the place to ask for anything. For example, if I make a post and read the comments, it is acceptable for me to reply in the comments with any logical request given the relationship I have with the comment poster. By commenting we are opening ourselves up for a request and therefore we should also be open to replies with requests. To make deeper relationships, we need to feel safe asking for what we need. I frequently ask followers that repeatedly comment to take the time to also vote for me as a witness after verifying that follower has not voted already. I am happy to see readers connecting in comments and building deeper relationships by asking for follows and upvotes in response to comment replies.
3. When engaging in chat outside of Steem such as on steemit.chat or on discord, it is appropriate to ask for any actions we need done inside Steem as long as we make it safe for the person responding to us to tell us no! I get a lot of requests for resteems and my answer to all has been no because the current interface clogs the blog up with resteems. When the interface handles resteems separately, I will be happy to take requests for resteems. I consistently receive requests for collaboration and sometimes it is hard for me to say no because the person asking is so enthusiastic for me to participate. The fact is I have months of my own projects to do already and am interested in collaborations within their contexts. When those are finished, I will consider collaborations outside of what I am already doing.

The Art of Asking and DON'T DO THIS programming!

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The issue we are looking at of asking for what we need in an appropriate way goes deep. My hope is in learning how to most effectively ask for what we need on Steem, we can make similar improvement sin our lives in more important issues such as sex, money, respect, health, etc. The most helpful book I have read about this subject is "The Art of Asking" by Amanda Palmer which helps reserve a lot of the unhelpful programming many of us have received from our parents which we continue doing going forward until we find a better way!

We struggle because we often are told so much what NOT to do there simply is no time left for being told what TO DO which we then often respond to the same way we respond to being told what not to do. In reading Deuteronomy last night in the King James version of the Holy Bible, I noticed that while Moses offered a few lines promising blessings for following God's rules, three pages were devoted to curses God would bring if the people did not follow the will of God. It seems thousands of years later our lives look much the same in terms of how we raise our children and therefore are raised into being adults. The church I go to daily for AA meetings has signs that say "Do not even THINK of stealing." Even though I have not stolen anything from a store since I was a teenager and have no desire to take anything home without paying, I ALWAYS think of stealing every time I read the sign.

In parenting my daughter, it is tempting to tell her what not to do when she starts slapping the dogs in the face or chewing on whatever is in reach. The secret is that she often responds very poorly to being told what NOT to do UNLESS I tell her what is acceptable behavior right after that. In fact, I often need to spend two to five times as much time explaining acceptable behavior which she then learns. Simply sharing what not to do often not only does not work but actually guarantees more of the original behavior. When I tell my daughter it is okay to slap the dogs on their butts and to chew the food we give her, she often immediately drops the other behavior. Meanwhile, the more I keep saying DO NOT DO THAT, the more she keeps doing it.

We face this same challenge on Steem where the exact acceptable behavior is often difficult to find amidst complaints of what not to do and guides that focus more on technical details but skip over the most critical parts for success like how to ask for votes. It is up to each of us to help explain what we like and do not like while realizing if we fail to do this, we are also giving up our right to be upset if standards are not met.

Witness voting tips.

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Witness voting is the perfect example of where few appropriate standards are made clear in a way that is easy for new witnesses to discover but any violation of the unspoken rules is condemned. I hope to have changed that some with this post which has provided 3 basic ways to ask for votes which are clearly explained along with the entire system I shared at https://steemit.com/witness-category/@jerrybanfield/how-to-start-getting-steem-witness-votes.

If what I wrote was not clear, it is appropriate to ask for witness votes in a post, in relevant reply to a comment, and in steemit.chat as well as discord especially in private chat. Asking for witness votes from witnesses we support is okay as long as we are okay with getting a high percentage of NO answers or non responses when getting started. It is not a good idea to ask for witness votes in wallet transfers based on my experience doing exactly that. I also would not recommend asking in irrelevant comments such as "How is your dog?" with "Great! Will you vote for me as a witness?"

If we do not clearly explain both what is preferred and what is avoidable, we have no right to expect anyone to follow unwritten or unspoken rules. While it is much easier to condemn others than to look at our own shortcomings, viewing our own faults tends to be very helpful and gives us the ability to reach our full potential. Here is a great post about this at https://steemit.com/life/@sostrin/its-judgement-day-jerry-banfield. As you might guess, I have spent a lot of time reviewing my own faults.

Show what works!

This is why I devote the majority of my effort to showing what is possible and worth doing because just saying what not to do often guarantees we actually see more of the same behavior. When we want to make a better world, it starts with forgiving the world that exists, forgiving the harm we did to others, and forgiving what has been done to us. I live in a world that I love and enjoy today which is not free from pain at all times and is a joy to exist in 98% of the time. I invite you to join us if that sounds different from your world! Thank you for reading this post which I hope was helpful!

Love,
Jerry Banfield

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PS: TIME FOR ME TO ASK :) Witness votes are the most important votes we make on Steem because one vote for a witness lasts indefinitely! Would you please make a vote for jerrybanfield as a witness or set jerrybanfield as a proxy to handle all witness votes at https://steemit.com/~witnesses because when we make our votes, we feel in control of our future together? Thank you to the 516 accounts voting for me as a witness, the 186M VESTS assigned from users trusting me to make all witness votes by setting me as proxy, and @followbtcnews for making these .gif images!

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