Learn to connect with your children and redirect their behaviors (child's brain)
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When things are not going as well as I want at home, when I see everything difficult about my children's education, I read the topics that can help me relax first, and then I think it's possible to help. When I know the new parenting strategies, I can reinvent myself as a mother. If something is wrong, I try it in a different way.
We obtained knowledge about the sides of the child's brain and its tasks, the differences between the left hemiferium that is more logical and the more emotional decade and how to help a horizontal integration of our children's brain.
To achieve a full and creative life in which the brains of our children work with what both sides contribute and is not dominated by any of them, there must be a correct communication and subsequent integration of both.
Today we will talk about a strategy that helps integrate the sides of children's brains, achieving the balance of their emotions: connect and redirect ...
Connect and redirect the child's brain
We as parents have experienced times when our children say things and complain in appearance for no reason.
CONNECT:
Connect emotionally with our children is to tune their emotions and learn to respect their stages, to know that their needs and thoughts are appropriate for their age. When a child feels angry, the logic for him does not make sense, it is necessary to integrate this emotional load, responding to the emotional needs of the right brain.
We must take advantage of those small moments of tantrums to connect with our children. At this moment the logical answers do not work and, as much as it seems absurd and incoherent the reason why our children make a tantrum, remember that for them they are real and important. They see their problems as we see, the only difference is that their concerns are not debt payments, their concerns are in tune with their age. It is a problem for them to open the package of cookies easily, not fall asleep on time and, we must respect the emotional load that this generates.
HOW DO WE CONNECT?
- To deactivate a tension situation, it is worth locating ourselves at the level of our eyes, bowing, touching them lightly, nodding and being empathetic.
- Give importance to your thoughts and emotions.
- We must talk less and listen more. If the child is talking uncontrollably, bothering him will not work, just listen and try to find what our child wants to tell us.
- Let's be a mirror, if we reflect what we hear because our children will feel happy and know that we are paying attention.
- Now that we can connect with our children and that the right hemisphere feels understood, we will redirect it using the left hemisphere. Remember that "every problem or situation can be an apprenticeship".
REDIRECT:
Once this need of the right brain is satisfied, we can now offer logical options and try to make the child propose his ideas and negotiate ours. With this exercise, we are forcing the left brain to activate the conversation and connect it with what we do for the integrated and coordinated functioning of both parties. This should always take place after the emotional bombardment because it is not a good time to learn lessons, usually when the left brain is not active.
My personal experience
I have a three-year-old girl, on occasion, she comes to me crying and telling me that she does not want to take a bath that she wants to watch children's videos.
The afternoons at my house are messy, let's say. Tasks, games, baths, and dinners occupy everything. Normally I would have gone to answer my girl something I said that type to shower then to shower. However, this time I remembered what I studied and decided to put it into practice, the first thing I had to do was connect with my daughter saying: I understand that you do not want to shower, because you're having a great time with your videos, right? At that moment he stopped crying, gave me a hug and told me that he wanted to watch the videos with me and dance together and how much he loves me. We had connected. Then he touched the redirect saying that you know you have to take a shower, because if we do not smell a little and do not want to, what does not?
As parents learn to balance their own emotions, without hesitating between their own feelings of guilt and anger, they can support and structure it more easily. Being well-intentioned and tuned will help children to have an emotional balance, learn to channel their failures, overcoming their fears. remember that we are the main example for our children, it is our responsibility that our children in the future are emotionally intelligent adults.
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Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://roseri.vornix.blog/2018/07/17/learn-to-connect-with-your-children-and-redirect-their-behaviors-childs-brain/
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Adults have to lower the pressure of the moment and put ourselves at children's level in all senses, it is simple with simple words, a gesture, a grimace, we interact with the smallest. It usually happens that adults forget that children can not reason as older people and it is there, where conflicts are unleashed.
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