Can Steem Monsters cure Influenza A?

My Totally Legit Scientific Experiment

Unfortunately, Influenza A has been spreading rampantly around where I live and has finally made it's way to me. I must admit, as someone who normally is busy from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed (generally way later than I should be), being able to lounge around might possibly outweigh the symptoms I have. I mean, if healthy, I would be working on one of a thousand projects around the house while trying to be a good father to my children (1 and 3) guaranteeing that if I ever sat down to get comfy something would come up to put a quick stop to that. However, when sick, I can lay in bed with my laptop and do whatever I like peacefully until I have to get up for something. The only drawback being a constant headache, a fever, chills when I have to leave the comfort of my bed, periodically getting sweaty in my bed, and a cough. Frankly, not too bad!

That being said, I do love my wife and I don't want her to have to be burdened with a ton of extra responsibility and work, so being a good husband I feel it is my duty to try and find a cure that is more efficient than Tamiflu. So naturally I got to thinking, playing Steem Monsters has never caused me to get the flu, I've never tried to play the game in order to kill the flu, and I've never been told that playing Steem Monsters cannot cure the flu. It would be scientifically selfish for me to not at least run some tests to see if playing Steem Monsters can cure influenza A. So, without further ado, here are the results.

Source

Trial 1: Won a game, still feel the same.
Trial 3: Won again, still feel the same. Don't worry about trial 2, not important.
Trials 4-20ish maybe?: totally won all the games I'm willing to remember, still not feeling any better.

I know what you're thinking. "Wow, that's a whole lot of data, how will I ever reach any conclusions from that?" Don't worry reader, I've done extensive analysis on the data and have come up with the answers to all of your questions below with a level of precision matched only by opinion page authors employed by "the Washington Post" who specialize in writing about social issues. This is totally legit!

Conclusion

Using what is absolutely and unequivocally the same scientific method that was behind some of the greatest advances in medical technology to date, I have concluded with a confidence interval of "super ultra confident" that Steem Monsters does not instantly and completely cure influenza A. However, I can also confirm, with science, that it does lead to fun, which could put a person in a better mental state, which could then lead to a marginally healthier immune system, which could then lead to an improved rate of recovery.

I can verify this notion by opening the first google result that has a somewhat similar title to my search and skimming the content just enough to see that there are some similarities. Check out this article that I found which says people are less likely to catch a common cold if they're positive people. Since colds have some of the same symptoms as the flu, and preventing one from catching a virus is almost identical to reducing the recovery time for a virus, I can confidently assert my position without bothering to do any additional research at all. Science for the win! This means that it is in fact worth playing Steem Monsters when sick with influenza A because it totally knocks time off your recovery, probably like a day or something. For those who doubt my findings, I would refer to you the number of times I said the word "Science" above. Only a witless troglodyte would argue with the merits of science, which this clearly is. Also, I am now a "Champion III" league Steem Monsters player, which means by virtue of my rank I have extra credibility regarding Steem Monsters related science.

What is Steem Monsters?
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*link above is an official affiliate link from the Steem Monsters website, it will kick back a small incentive to me if you make purchases in the game at no additional expense to you