Today's lesson is based on something we all kind of know inherently, but I wanna make it more specific. The old school rule in human dynamic is,

If you show that you like someone, they're more likely to like you. Maybe that isn't obvious to a lot of people. I think a lot of people don't act like that's obvious. It's a fundamental truth... Is that when we show that there's something we like in someone else, they're more likely to like us.

The reason I wanna make this more specific is I feel like it's something we don't do nearly enough with each other, is...

Be blatant about what we like about someone else. We often go away thinking things, and we then tell a third person. We go away from an interaction, and we go to a third person, and we say,

But to do that is to miss the benefits, is a way, of having that thought, because if you were actually to give it to the person you thought that about, they're far more likely to like you. They're far more likely thinking about you.

I even remember being eleven years old at a school disco, and I was on the dance floor with a bunch of people dancing, and I did this funny spin just to be silly, and there was a guy there who looked at me, and he goes,

Immediately, it... Created this warm feeling, 'cause I was like,

Ya know? I've never forgotten it. I was eleven years old... I've never forgotten it in my life. How many people in your life do you not give those compliments to when they come into your head?

Because of that, by the way, that's the time to do it. Is the moment you feel something, od the moment you think about it. Just tell'em. Just be honest about it.

I have a couple of friends come to visit me in Los Angeles maybe two, three weeks ago. There was a friend that I have in L.A. Who met two of my friends from back home, and she was sitting with my friends from back home. And one of my guys from back home made this funny, dry... Very dry in English comment. And she looked at me and she went,

She goes,

And she said it. It was like in her head immediately. She didn't hold back. She just said it. We never saw her again the whole trip, but he wouldn't stop talking about her and referencing her because she'd seen something in him. And that's something we don't do enough. We don't recognize the great qualities is each other.

By the way, if you wanna take this to a more advanced level. Don't just recognize the same obvious quality that everybody else does. Look for that thing that they do well that perhaps isn't complimented all that often.

People are so used to getting complimented on the ten percent of themselves that everybody sees. You know, that... That person who's pretty is used to being called pretty a lot. That person who is always funny is used to being called funny, but we're used to ninety percent of our personalities not being recognized. Not being credited. Well if you could be one person who seeks out that ninety percent, that part other people don't see, and compliment people on it, you're gonna glow to everybody around you. They will think of about you differently as the person who either gets them, or sees something in them that other people don't or sees their potential, but you'll hold a very special place in their mind, and in their heart.

Resteem