It's funny i see your post now...seems to be my theme today as i commented somewhere else that the culture of constructive controversy is lost. And because i said that i was thinking about the reasons why. I thought about the education we get today not to offend anybody - to hold back your true thoughts - to be political correct and so on.... You brought up some more points i didn't think of and i wish i had seen them earlier so my answer would have been more detailed ;) . And you are so right that we need more people with the ability to differ what a human says and who he is in general and not to make up a war if someone says something different from your own beliefs. More people who try to understand their opposite...and more people who are willing to listen and learn from other people..
Something else: i saw you above talking about notifications or better the lack of them in steemit ;) . There is a solution .... take a look at ginabot - it's very helpful :)
https://steemit.com/ginabot/@ginabot/ginabot-the-best-notifcation-service-in-the-steemiverse