In a world that was completely flat, one man received $40 and a British girl for one post, but then lost it all after transferring them both to Poloniex.

Staring:
@gonzo as Oznog
@cathi-xx as The British Girl
@poloniex Customer Support as The Stereotypical Villain

See @gonzo as you've never seen him before, sending emails to @poloniex explaining that he has a very particular set of skills, in hopes of getting back everything that was taken.