What should I do.... Im jobless hoping for steemit but now I will lost my home

Last year in December 2017

I thought that I have found a new job for the living ... but it turn out to be a nightmare I was hopeless right now...
I don't blame anything it just a matter of luck... so I guess I ran out of it...
I can't get out of the chain.... Less effort ... That might be one of it too.
Can't get attention more viewer for the less attractive content... Totally fail in communication...
The region where I stay or at right now seem could not get anyone want to know more about it...
Rain forest? Orang Utan! ...Hornbill! this make people laugh ... giant snake! Borneo? where the hell is it....
Only the sexy lady able to get more votes ...
Right now I have more than 1k followers and friends but that just .... that 1k plus the loyal bot the bid bots...
I surf around try to learn more ... but I get nothing IF i didn't top up my steem... I don't know.. MAy beI have this low self-esteem lately... The more I try the harder it became...I did not say that I will quit but... I have to be unseen for a while... Ranting over nothing just like lunatic talk to the PC while typing my words and I don't give a damn about any grammatical error ... let see how many of you will laugh at my content.... and if you do... tell me why..that might fix something and help me out to revive from this mess ...
Thanks you that all ... not the best quality but that is how I felt right now...... add me in you PUBG team at least