🖤 Love Decentralized: Claire's Views on Relationships, Unraveled (Part 1)

in #steemit7 years ago (edited)

I find such joy in embracing the organic nature of a blossoming connection.

Isn't it a lovely feeling?

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Observing the basis of how relationships are formed, sustained and diminished has always fascinated me. It is a great passion of mine. I feel nervous, but excited to share my thoughts with you all.

I believe that healthy relationships with ourselves leads to healthy relationships with others. And being that we are all connected, putting the work into rewiring old thinking about how we “do relationships” is extremely important if we want to co-create a peaceful and prosperous future together.

What I have come to learn in the past 4.5 years of exploring the vast spectrum of relationships is that one may discover freedom and serenity in the awareness and acceptance of one’s mental/emotional patterns-- patterns that become more ingrained, yet somewhat more hidden from us, when we engage in relationships with others.

One of these patterns is the desire to control others. I wonder where we learn that one from?

Human relationships are the backbone of society. And the "rules" of society are reflected in the relationships we create.

In making the conscious decision to embrace self-rulership and decentralize our relationships, we can collectively rearrange our social reality in a way that is wholly beneficial.

To relearn, renew and rebuild our relationships with others in this way, we begin to empower ourselves as individuals, fostering a stronger sense of autonomy and inter-dependence.

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Humans are such complex creatures! When we hide from our true selves and our deepest fears, the relationships that manifest become self-sabotaging. The further we embrace the hurt, the difficulty, the awkwardness, and the fear especially, the closer we find ourselves to the surface.

It will not be an easy journey. You will work harder than you ever have in your life, unraveling everything you’ve ever learned about how to relate to and be vulnerable with other people.

But you are not alone.

I am here to navigate the darkness with you. Share with me your greatest fears and worries, and let us shine light onto them. I want to hear your most challenging questions about relationships. I strive to debunk the myths and lies we’ve been told over and over again regarding how we are supposed to do, or act in, relationships.

Together, we will learn to empower ourselves, without feeling the need for assurance from other humans. Let us nurture and grow our own self-worth from within. Let us befriend our own selves, and be our own partners.

Let us learn to love ourselves.

There is value in learning to cultivate patience with yourself as you become confronted with your own shadows.

For how we relate to ourselves reflects how we relate to others. We are all mirrors for each other, after all.

❂ Reflection ❂

1. What limits do you place on your own relationships?

2. Are there any patterns you've noticed in yourself that you are actively working on changing, when you are in a partnership?

3. What are your usual pitfalls in committed relationships, and how have you overcome them thus far?

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I would feel so grateful if you could upvote, or resteem this post, especially if it spurred the clockwork of your mind!

Thank you for your time, Steemians. 🖤

Tags: #relationships #nonmonogamy #steem #philosophy #anarchy #selfcare #selfrulership #decentralize

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Thank you for this interesting, thought provoking post! Here's what the clockwork of my mind has conjured up:

Selfishness is generally deeply misunderstood, or underrated at best.

There is such great beauty in a person who puts themselves first in their life, knows what they want and what they don't, and understands that being selfish doesn't have to come at the expense of others... on the contrary!

In order to connect with someone, you need to be aware of yourself. Honesty with others starts at honesty with yourself.

I love the image of the hexagons. It illustrates so well how each of us is an individual within a matrix of inter-relatedness.

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