confession story. #21

Male

"Life ??? Now and 5 years ago ...
Love is a beautiful feeling making you vulnerable to both happiness and sadness. I could never analyse which one did i get more. Maybe because i never thought love as a give and take thing. I didn't fall in love with her... I was in love with her. It wasn't hard for me to tell why i was in love with her but i never would have imagined to be loved back. Life really surprises you with unexpected situations and circumstances.

Before i start let me tell you every story has an ending. I can never forget the day i met her for the very first time. It was 4th July 2012 at about 5:30 in the evening. It was raining outside and i was having my coffee and cigarette. I would have never noticed her but i had to meet her so the story of us would start. So an unusual thing happened. ""Badarni ma chai ghar rujhera janu? "" Her voice was loud enough that i could hear. She was with her other two friends. I am not good with words to describe her beauty. But those innocent eyes were damn magnetic enough to make me stare the whole time. Suddenly i got mom's call and i had to leave. While i paid the bill, she was nowhere to be found. I was about to leave when i heard her voice saying ""Excuse me dai, chaata share garna milxa ?? malai tei kumaripati samma janu parne."". All i could reply was ""huss"". Both of us were silent for the entire time. We reached kumaripati and she said ""Thank You dai"" and left. At that moment i was like wtf just happened.

It was usual until that day. I was returning from my college and waiting for a micro at jawalakhel. I saw her. Well its obvious i started following her since she was going kumaripati and i had to reach lagankhel. She had an earphone plugged onto her ears and i swear she didn't look back even once. After that day, i started walking from college till lagankhel just in a hope to see her but luck wasn't favoring me.

It was November 14 at Civil Mall, After watching Jab Tak Hai Jaan, I saw her at one of the shop. I made excuse to friends that i have work and stayed there. Well i dont know why i never approached for a conversation. All i ended up was following her till kumaripati. Then after a week i started seeing her at jawalakhel on a regular basis. It must be a coincidence that i always saw her after the college and All i did was follow her...

It had been a week that i followed her. The day finally came when we first had a real conversation. Like usual i saw her after college and i was following her. She was walking slowly than she used to. She had reached opposite to U.F.O. Suddenly she turned around and walked towards me and said ""sadhai follow matra garne ho? "". I was speechless. ""Bolna aaudaina? Afai bolna aaunu bhayena thikai cha. ma bolna aauda ta bolnu"" All i could say was ""huss"".

Her: Ma Alisha, hajur ko naam chai??
Me: i said my name.
Her: micro ma nagai malai follow garnu bho.. asti civil mall bata ni follow garnu
bho. tespaxi tapai chuti hune samaye ma jaile milayera aye. Ek hapta kure tei ni bolna aaunu bhayena. K sadhai follow matra garne plan ho?

Me: (silent)
Her: bolna aaudaina??
Me: Sorry.
Her: (after laughing) Mero kaam cha aaile ma janchu.
Me: huss
Her: tapaile magnu hudaina jasto lagyo. Mobile dinu ta tapaiko
Me: kina??
Her: Number lina ni k mobile chor jasto lagcha tapai lai?
Me: (smiling) haina
She dialled her number from mine
Her: Bye see you soon.
Me: Bye

She left... and i was still thinking what the hell did just happen...
All the way till home i was smiling and frequently looking at her number.
It was about 10:30 at night. (Phone ringing) it was hers. I took a deep breath and picked up.
Me:hello
Her: Number diye pachi phone garnu parcha bhanne thachaina?? kati kure maile.
Me: Sorry
Her: hare tapai pani jaile sorry bhandai basnu.
Me: ani k bhannu ta?
Her: tapailai kt sanga bolna ni sikaunu parne aba??
Me: khasai koi sanga boldina so bolne bani chaina
Her: Follow matra garna aaucha ho??
Me: hahahaha haina haina
Her: Bholi college chaina?? sutnu pardaina hajur lai?
Me: aba sutna lako ho.
Her: Bholi college pachi bhetnu la. you know where to find me.
Me: ok huss gudnite

After that we started meeting daily, phone call ani facebook ma chat... We had become really good friends. I am saying friends because we never shared our feelings. We both were in love but we both never expressed. It had been more than a year. It was February 14, she called me and asked to meet her at Krishna Mandir at 5 pm. I reached early and was waiting for her. Finally she came. I can never explain how beautiful she looked. I was just looking at her until she came near me. She kissed me on my cheeks and whispered on my ear. ""I Love You fuchuu. "". I was literally blushing.

Her: I waited a year to say what i feel for you. I was in love with you eversince I have known you. I know its weird that I am confessing now but I wanted to be sure and waited for you to be in love with me. I know you would have never confessed your feelings so here i am.

Me: I Love You too Ali...

She had arranged everything. We went to a cafe. Her best friend was waiting for us. There was a cake which had a line ""Life, Moments, You and Me"". I felt like i am the luckiest person. I hugged her and kissed her on forehead.

Its been 199 days Ali... I miss you. I Love you. I know the feeling is mutual. Life is unfair. You used to say ""Even if we get separated, we will live for each other. Our body may be different but our soul will always be the same. Life always brings you to a situation where you have to make a choice. My choice was, is and always will be you. You always understood me. The sad part is my parents didn't. You used to say me sorry but this time I am Sorry. Please Forgive Me. I know you but i couldn't understand my parents... yes we tried alot but we failed. I hope that day will come when they understand us but I am afraid it might be too late. I know you will always wait for me. I love you fuchhuu... I will always miss you. take care of yourself and thank you for coming in my life. Goodbye love... Please Move on "" "