I can imagine it must be hard to leave your digital friends, but everything will be fine. There are much better platforms than Steemit to do your thing. Yes, it's hard to leave. It's full of fantastic people here, but the structure of the platform is just not right. Everything feels so artificial. You might want tot take a look at https://u.community/. It's still in alpha phase, but in one month I already had more meaningful conversations than the time I spent here. Invite your friends and start over. See setbacks as an opportunity to start over again! Good luck.