Thank you for resteeming this article, @denmarkguy. I learned so much from it. As a newbie, I was following the advice from the person who invited me in. I have already broken some norms by just blindly following someone's advice. @Luzcypher, thank you very much for writing about this.

I would like to second what @denmarkguy states about human nature. I joined two communities about 5 years ago. One was an online community to learn about publishing on Amazon. One was a physical community; an intentional condominium community. 2 very different environments.

The learning curve was fierce in both. Overwhelm, sorting through what was helpful, what was not, trying to contribute but not make people mad left me somewhat crazed for the first 2 months I participated.. I got a reputation in the actual community that I lived in, that for a handful of people still has not changed. They think I am here just to reble/rouse. Regardless of the many hours that I contribute, they made up their mind that I was not a worthy addition to their community. They were one of the founders you see, and they have invested years and much time and energy into it. I however as a newbie, came into it in the honeymoon stage, raving about how wonderful it was, and if we could just change this and this, it would be superb. I never understood the pushback, until just this last year, as I finally see that what to me was a compliment, was to them a criticism.

Having watched new people come to live where I live, and join that online community that I mentioned, has taught me a lot. I would ask all of us to be patient with the newbies. It takes time to learn the norms. Coaching the newbies is really helpful, if you have the time. Taking the time to write a blog post like this is really helpful.