The Secret To Being Happy

I had such a good time writing my blog post yesterday about raising my chi energy, that I think I raised enough of it to post something new today.

Yes, I titled it provocatively. Because I know that people want to know secrets. And I also know people want "magic bullet" remedies for all of life's ills, this being one of them: how to be happy.

Well first off, let's get this one off the table: you will never be happy ALL THE TIME. If you were, you would be hauled off and locked up in an insane asylum. Our current social structure is not set up for someone to be happy all the time. If you were, or if you knew someone that tried to be happy all the time, you would likely be creeped out and wonder what the f**k was wrong with them (or you, if it was you).

And there are really no secrets. There are only strategies. Some of these will work very well for a long time. Some will work for a while, then wear off, and then you have to try a different strategy. So, going back to my point in the previous paragraph: you will NEVER be happy all the time. However, you can be happy a majority of the time, or at least in the moments between your self-created (and sometimes self-indulgent) misery (this will be another blog entry).

Strategy #1: (I know you've ALL heard this one at least once ... and if not, get out from that rock you're living under!) Be grateful. That's right. But not only be grateful, ACT grateful. Behave in a way that makes you feel your gratitude. It is one of the most centering things you can do, and it's free.

First, you can make a list of things you are grateful for. That's pretty easy (or pretty hard, depending on how you operate). Make a list of five things. Or more than five. Or at least one. And then feel your gratitude for each of those things as you think of them. Having them on a list is one thing, having them only in your mind is another. You must animate them. Feel them.

Second, if you cannot come up with a list, just take a look around you. Look at something in your immediate vicinity and feel grateful for its presence in your life, or at least in this moment.

Third, if all else fails from my above suggestions, then here's the final one for this strategy: place your hands (that's right, both hands) on your heart. Close your eyes and breathe slowly in and out. While doing this, say to yourself, "I'm grateful I'm alive." And keep doing it for at least five minutes, timed. I think you'll feel better, if not different.

Strategy #2: (this one may be a lot harder than it sounds) Laugh. That's right. Just laugh. Even when (sometimes ESPECIALLY when) you don't want to. Force yourself. It's easy. You can do it. I know it's going to feel silly and awkward. It may even feel humiliating. So, here's how you do it: if you've been in a funk for a while, force yourself to just laugh for at least two minutes. It doesn't sound like a lot of time, but it is. And time yourself. You have no idea how long two minutes really feels while doing something you have no inclination to partake in. It will feel longer than you believe it will. If you're a really hardcore case, laugh for FIVE minutes. And I really mean laugh. Not just a little titter or a tiny guffaw. But press that belly, abdomen and diaphragm and have a hearty belly laugh for at least two minutes. One, you'll likely be tired out from all the effort. Two, you'll probably feel better, or at least different. Sometimes, if you do this right, it can change your mind about what got you in the dumps in the first place.

Strategy #3: Go for a one-hour walk in nature. Just you. If this is not possible in your immediate vicinity (I'm lucky, I live in Vancouver Canada and I'm surrounded by it) then just go for a walk in an unfamiliar (but safe!) part of your town or city. It creates new synaptic connections by going out and experiencing a new environment. And it must be at least an hour of walking (you can rest in between, depending on your physical state). The physical movement combined with the new environment cures many a dark mood because you're not focused solely on the thing (or things) getting you down.

As a bonus, do gratitude while walking. You'll be surprised at the results. As with my last blog post, this is by no means a complete "be all - end all" list. There are many other strategies and suggestions you can try. But everything I've suggested above for you to do costs you nothing but having to spend time with yourself.

Because at the end of it all, that's who you'll be with when they put you in a box and bury you in the ground: with yourself.

WARM HUGS