@bdmr Thank you for your very thoughtful comment,

Having finished my masters recently I just realized that there are really no answers just different questions. Although I do love science I also think I could never be happy doing research. My interests are just too broad, what I love about science is the big picture how all the pices fit together with such harmony, it is true art. But when you do research you just funnel your knowledge to focus on some tiny detail and lose the beauty of the big picture.

I think you just articulated a feeling that I had in my mind and hadn't quite manage to put into words myself. This is definitely another reason why I think experimental research (especially in the way it is usually conducted in academia nowadays) is not for me.