How I Made Billions Blogging! And So Can You!

      Two years ago I was a pathetic schlub with no money, no friends, and no future. One day, I was drunkenly perusing YouTube when I saw it. The video that changed my life forever! Now I'm wealthy beyond belief, full of future stuff, and I have so many friends I have to make up excuses to avoid them. Life is good. And yours can be too. I'll show you how.

Blog Your Way To Success!

      Skeptical? I was too...at first. Then I wrote my first post. I explained how we could solve the world's energy problem using a deck of cards, twenty three sour cream and onion potato chips, and a liter of Mountain Dew. Not knowing what to expect, I hit Post.

      The sound of my phone going off woke me the next morning. It was my ex. "You're all over the internet! Let's get together for lunch!" Confused, I turned on my computer to discover I had become a viral sensation. Everyone was talking about my energy solution. That first post earned me enough money to buy this house...

_{I look a little drunk here. You would, too, if you lived in a party mansion. (1)}

      But it's definitely not about the money. Since that first post, I've solved numerous other issues that have plagued us throughout history and have helped thous- millions of people. And, in return, I've made a crap-ton of money! Just look at where I live now...!

_{Patrolling the ramparts! (2)}

Comment Your Way To Riches!

      Not good at writing? No worries! With my system you can earn money simply by leaving comments on what other people post. I'll show you step-by-step how to write guaranteed money-makers. Writing such gems like...

"Nice references."
"Followed and resteemed. You do same."
"I like this."
"5"

      ...has made me enough money to finance some of the most expensive hobbies there are.

_{That's three for me! (3)}

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_{I'm so successful I drive two cars at once. (4)}

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_{Proof of yacht. (5)}

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_{I'm so successful I catch two fish at once. (6)}

Upvote Advantage!

      As if that wasn't enough. If you act now, you'll be enrolled in our exclusively private Upvote Advantage Club! Membership grants you rewards just for upvoting other people's posts or comments. It's that simple. What are you waiting for! Your fortune awaits! Sign up today!

_{Almost forgot to brag about my action figure. (7)}

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Disclaimer:

Results not typical.

A special thank you to all of the friends I've made here on Steemit over these last two years. Without you I wouldn't still be here. I can't even imagine where I'll be in another two years. Keep on Steeming on!

Attribution:

(1) This picture has been modified from the original and is used under PixaBay License
(2) This picture has been modified from the original and is used under Pexels License
(3) Giphy.com
(4) Giphy.com
(5) This images is a derivative of "Fishing on a yacht in the Indian Ocean XOKA3214s" by Phuket@photographer and is used under CC BY 2.0
(6) This images is a derivative of "Fishing on a sailing yacht, Andaman sea near Phuket XOKA3150s" by Phuket@photographer and is used under CC BY 2.0
(7) This picture has been modified from the original and is used under PixaBay License

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