Look, I have to tell you something about myself before getting deeper into this post, uhm, I don’t think. I do try to think of what I’m saying, and say everything that I’m thinking but, when it comes to taking action, I don’t think too much. I analyze the situation, I figure out my options, and I just do it; especially when the situation is rather scary, unknown. I try not to think much of all the bad stuff that could happen, and I just go with my head first.

It might not be the best way to approach life in general but, it’s certainly effective when it comes to taking action, and experiencing new things since it doesn’t allow you to think of all the fucked up things that could happen but they never end up happening. Now, because of this, because I jumped, and decided to attend SteemFest without worrying too much about all the details, I had no time to think about all the things that I might be afraid of. I didn’t allow myself any time to think of those things actually.

“He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.”― Samuel Johnson

No idea why I added this here, I just felt like it would fit in perfectly.

This is just the way I trained myself to act because if I would start pondering over all the possibilities, and bullshit scenarios that will never take place, I might end up not taking action at all, and that’s way worse than taking action and failing miserably.

Fears

When it comes to SF, I’m honestly not worried about so many things, partly because I am meeting up with friends that I interacted with since joining this platform, partly because even if I make a fool out of myself it doesn’t matter, and partly because I’ll be half drunk, half hangover the whole week. Actually, I probably will make a fool out of myself but, that’s alright because the community is not expecting (at least I hope so) great things from me, I set the standard pretty low so I can allow myself to fuck up, and be carefree.

I’m honestly not worried at all that I will end up alone, bored, or in one of those awkward silences when I’m talking to people. I’m not the best at human interactions but, because I don’t think too much about everything that’s going on, I’m not stuck in my head, and I allow myself to authentically interact with people.

I have no issues when it comes to talking to strangers, I actually love it, and I always enjoy making fun of the things around me but, and this is one of the few things I’m afraid of, because English is not my native language, I’m afraid that it might fuck my interactions up. I can write in English all day but, when it comes to speaking, I have a bit of an impediment since my accent if fucked. I don’t worry too much about it tho, I just hope that I’ll be able to be myself freely.

Also, uhm, I’m going to be talking at SteemFest together with @alexvan. Yes, this is one of those things that I didn’t thought too much about but, I took up the opportunity on the spot. I’m not the best at public speaking, I am fairly decent, and I’m sure that English will make things harder but, I think I got it nevertheless.

Anyway, I’m not afraid of too many things when it comes to SF to be honest since, regardless of the outcome, regardless if I make a complete fool out of myself or not, it doesn’t matters because people will probably forget everything once the event is over. Anyway, we’re all too busy analyzing ourselves, nobody has time to think too much, and analyze others.

Oh, by the way, I suck at this “RTSF” freewriting game, most of my posts were edited because, when I write, I just like to put ideas on paper so I don’t forget about them, and end up putting the pieces together later. But, this is a 99% authentic freewriting for your reading pleasure.

Thank you for reading, see you at SF.